#so I just sent a message directly to their help desk (ha) and if I still don’t hear shit I’m taking the plushie project elsewhere

[see-arcane]

Hey real quick, I’m enlisting anybody who reads this to make sure that if [REDACTED] manufacturer doesn’t reply to my third estimate query email by Friday, I drop them and move on to other options for the plushie project, please and thank you

[pastanest]

Spencer Reid x she/her!reader

A/N: I am currently obsessed w the premise of a reader who is just totally smitten by the super shy and introverted Reid from early seasons bc he deserved SO MUCH MORE APPRECIATION it upsets me at least thrice a day!

gif creds: @themoontaxi

Heaven Sent

“There’s an old Buddhist saying that, when you meet your soulmate, remember that the act to bring you together was 500 years in the making.” Spencer tells you with a thoughtful expression as you perch on his desk, smiling down at him in his office chair, your heart lifting in your chest as he continues. “So always appreciate and be kind to each other - there’s a corollary for friends!” And just like that, your heart falls back into place, but your smile doesn’t falter, there’s no way that it can when you’re still looking at him. “When you meet a true friend, you will be bound together through space and time for 500 years.” Spencer ends his tidbit of trivia with a smile that very nearly sends you flying from his desk and into orbit.

As per usual, you try to keep your cool, offering him a beaming smile. “Bound together through space and time for 500 years, eh? For a Buddhist quote, that does sound a bit Doctor-Who.” You tease lightly, and when Spencer’s eyes crinkle with a laugh that you have brought him, you feel all 500 years spent drifting through space to find him, smack you right in the chest.

“It does, actually, you make a great point!” Your favorite genius chuckles up at you, a look in his eyes that has you reaching the same conclusion to the age-old philosophical question of whether heaven is real, because every time Spencer Reid looks you in the eye, you know you could argue to the ends of the earth with any philosopher that tries to tell you it isn’t. 

“Alright, Doc, I’m gonna go take a scheduled pee break but I expect another fascinating fact from you on my return!” You order playfully as you hop off of his desk, never any malice or sarcasm in your voice when you regard his seemingly endless knowledge. Spencer feels the sincere love you have for his facts, something few people have shown him. 

“I’ll try my best, but I can’t promise anything!” Spencer calls after you as you stroll towards the bathroom, your phone already in your hands, frantically typing a few texts to your best friend.

You: good god

You: I want him

You: so bad

Spencer’s retort catches you off guard, your thumbs slipping on your phone as you turn to look back at him, walking backwards and continuing to type without looking. 

“Spencer Reid, if there is ever anything that you can promise me, it’s a new fact with a few minutes prep, don’t lie to me!” You joke right back to him, the two of you sharing a laugh across the office as you reach the bathroom and disappear behind the door.

As you lean against the bathroom door, you release the breath you were holding in your lovesick chest and smile so hard your face hurts. In the midst of your recovery from such a wholesome interaction with your favorite person, you hit send on the text you’d typed, your eyes closed as you relive Spencer’s smile again and again.

You: it physically hurts

Then, your phone makes a peculiar sound that causes your heart to sing. Spencer’s text tone, specially selected so that you never get your hopes up at anyone else’s text tone coming through. As if your thoughts summoned him, Spencer has texted you, despite the fact you were speaking to him mere seconds ago. However, as you glance down at your phone to see his message, your blood runs cold. Much to your absolute horror, you have somehow managed to send that last message you typed and sent without looking, not to your best friend like the previous messages, but directly to the subject of the conversation.

Spencer: What physically hurts? Are you okay? Do you need help? 

The panic response in your body is so real it’s scary, every fiber of your being screaming in utter hysteria as you run your hand through your hair with eyes like a deer in headlights. This is the worst possible mistake to have made, but, maybe you can white-lie your way out of this, since that message didn’t mention Spencer by name. Frantically, you type out your response back to him.

You: Spencer I am so sorry omg Im fine that message was not meant for you 

Nodding to yourself, you take some deep breaths. Spencer is never one to invade a person’s privacy outside of it being professionally required to do so and by revealing so little in your reply, you are communicating that the matter is private and was unintentionally, partially revealed to him. 

Spencer: Oh, okay. Still, if you are in any kind of pain, please let me know; if there is anything I can do to help/anything I can get you, I will.

And, of course, Doctor Spencer Reid manages to make you smile like an idiot with such a simple, sweet text.

You: thanks, Spence, that’s really kind of you. Im ok tho, I promise!! :)

Spencer: Hold on, you went to the bathroom and complained of pain - is it your menstrual cycle? I have towels and tampons in my desk.

Your eyes widen at his boldness, but also sweetness, to ask such a thing. How cute, he thinks you’re embarrassed to admit to him that you are on your period and not at all completely humiliated by your massive crush on him, almost being exposed in its entirety because you were, ironically, distracted by him.

You: nono, trust me, Im ok!! 

Frowning in sudden confusion, you are quick to type out another text before Spencer responds to your first one.

You: why do you have those?

Spencer: I am a doctor, I work with people who menstruate and should not have to pay for such things if I have some that I can provide for free. 

And he has you smiling like a lovesick idiot. Again. 

You: wow, that’s really sweet Spence :’)

Spencer: Is It? Thank you! B)

Another confused frown furrows your brow as you stare at your phone screen quizzically.

You: what’s “B)”

Spencer: Sunglasses face. A cool guy. B) 

God bless this man and his total inability to use actual emojis, you are having to stifle your laughter with a hand over your mouth because otherwise you are certain the entire office would hear you.

You: omg of course it is! so cute!!

Spencer: B)

The second you see it on your screen again, you are trying to contain your laughter a second time. His ability to be completely and utterly adorable is unmatched.

Spencer: You have been in the bathroom for some time and have not yet clarified the reason for texting someone that you were in physical pain. Are you absolutely certain that you are alright? 

Panic begins to set in again as you consider your options, none of which including confessing the truth from within the bathroom stall you are hiding in.

You: look, I cant tell you the reason I texted that but I promise you I am absolutely fine!! 

The moment the ‘read’ symbol appears by your last text, there’s a knock at the bathroom door.

“Hey sweetpea, boy-wonder told me you were in some kind of pain, is everything alright in there? Do you need a tamp? A hot water bottle? Some soup? A-” While your dear friend, Penelope Garcia, continues to list things that you could possibly need, through the bathroom door, you are frantically typing to Spencer again.

You: did you send Pen over here

He responds diligently, of course.

Spencer: I am sorry if I have breached your privacy at all, I thought you might feel more comfortable talking to Penelope about whatever is going on, but I hope you know you can always talk to me about anything.

Sighing and closing your eyes in a pained blink, you call out. “I’m fine, Pen, seriously!”

But, ever the carer of the team, Penelope will not let that slide. “Well, I’m not leaving until you come out here and prove it to me.”

Now, you are physically and emotionally cornered. There is absolutely no way that Penelope will let you out of here without an explanation, and there is absolutely no way that you can lie to her, either. Alright, time to bite the bullet.

“Pen…if I come out, you must promise to take me straight to your office and I’ll tell you everything, but you cannot tell a soul, okay?” You ask her through the door, and you can practically hear the gossip-loving cogs in her brain turning on the other side.

“You got it, sweetness! C’mon out!” Penelope calls, and you take a deep breath, shoving your phone in your back pocket before unlocking the door and stepping back into the office.

Immediately, Penelope swings an arm around you and leads you to her office with haste. All the while, you can feel a certain pair of very attractive, swoon-inducing eyes on you, worrying after you.

The second you are alone together in her office, Penelope sits you down and pulls her chair up to sit opposite you, taking ahold of your hands.

“Spill it!”

You sigh, avoiding her eyes. “This is about to be the most humiliating confession of my life.”

Penelope’s eyes widen, her pupils practically dilating at the raised stakes of what this gossip could entail. “No, no, come on, this is a safe space!”

You nod. “I know, I know, but…admitting aloud to any member of the team is something I hoped I’d avoid forever.” You chuckle in disbelief. “Basically, I was texting my friend some very private things and then got distracted by Spencer and accidentally sent him one of the texts- it’s probably just easier if I show you.” You decide, retrieving your phone and showing her the texts you had originally been sending to your best friend, then the one you accidentally sent to Spencer. 

Penelope’s jaw drops. “Oh my goodness! Who are you talking about in those texts?!”

You roll your eyes playfully. “Go on, Pen, take a guess. Who is the one person I wouldn’t want to find out about my crush, except for the crush himself.”

And Penelope Garcia’s jaw has hit the floor, she is in a state of shock. So severely, in fact, you have to wave a hand in front of her face.

“Earth to Penelope?” You ask, amused. 

She blinks rapidly at you, her spirit seemingly returning to her as she starts to squeal. “Ohmygosh, ohmygosh, ohmygosh! I knew it, I absolutely knew it!”

Then, your phone dings, a text tone that sends goosebumps rippling up your arm. 

Spencer: Is everything okay? I am sorry if I upset you by telling Penelope, I was just concerned for you. Can I talk to you before we leave for the day, please?

Without hesitation, you show the text to Penelope, seeking her moral support in your time of need. “Now that you know what’s going on, please help me, what the hell am I supposed to do?!”

The technical analyst spins in her chair, typing away on her keyboard before bringing up a direct feed of one of the security cameras inside the main office. The two of you can see Spencer, sitting at his desk with his bag and coat on, ready to leave for the day, but glancing between his phone and the text he’s sent you that’s now showing as ‘read’ and Penelope’s office door, with a worried expression.

“Honestly, sweetpea, I don’t think you’ve got a choice but to tell him. The two of you are so close, he’ll see right through any white-lie you tell him and worry even more that he’s done something to upset you. The most painless way out of this is to just tell him the truth.” Penelope says, wincing at her own words as she looks at you because she knows how much it would hurt to have someone tell her that, if she were in your situation. 

Looking back up at Spencer on the monitor, seeing his worried expression, your heart aches at the thought of making him overthink about something he’s said or done, never wanting to cause him that kind of distress.

Sighing in defeat, you nod. “You’re right, Pen.”

Fixing your gaze back on your phone screen, you start to type, not missing the way Spencer’s eyes light up on the monitor at the notification of you typing back to him.

You: sorry Spence, I didn't mean to worry you, I'm all good! now coming :)

As silly as it is, the smiley face you send him brings a small smile to Spencer’s actual face, and that gives you the only confidence you need to rise from your seat. 

“Good luck, sweetness!” Penelope squeals, pulling you into a hug before practically shoving you out of her office.

Stepping into Spencer’s line of sight, he immediately starts walking over to you.

“Hey, I’m so sorry that I told Garcia, I know I shouldn’t have-” He begins to ramble, but your smile stops him in his tracks.

“You don’t need to apologize, Spencer, I promise, everything is fine. Are you ready to head out?” You ask him as he follows you over to your own desk, so that you can collect your own jacket and bag. 

“Y-Yeah.” He replies nervously, very obviously still worrying because you haven’t told him the whole truth yet, rendering him unable to settle.

The two of you walk to the elevator in silence, but as the doors close, isolating the two of you, you take a deep breath.

“You’re going to think my explanation is ridiculous, just to pre-warn you.”

Spencer frowns seriously, turning to face you, giving you his full attention. “Nothing you say is ever ridiculous, not to me. What’s going on?” His voice is so soft that it has you weak at the knees, which does not make this any easier. 

“I was texting a friend of mine and then carried on typing when I looked back to answer you, meaning I accidentally sent the next text to you.” The explanation is simple, in essence, but Spencer is nodding along like you are reciting some holy scripture. Biting the bullet completely this time, you pass Spencer your phone with shaking hands, allowing him to read the texts you sent your friend.

“But…you sent these after talking with me? While still talking with me?” He asks quizzically, for a moment blinded by his own obliviousness and a sadness settles in his heart because he truly believes you were thinking of some other guy when just speaking to him, but as the more logical conclusion presents itself to him, Spencer’s eyes widen.

You are unable to look at him, your gaze fixed on the closed elevator doors in front of you as you gently take your phone and conceal it back in your pocket. “Yep.” Is, somehow, the only word you can muster. 

Spencer parts his lips to speak, but the elevator doors open, and you all but make a break for it.

“Sorry. See you tomorrow, Spencer.” You blurt out hurriedly as you speed walk out of the building and into the parking lot, feeling physically sick as tears blur your vision, knowing you have single handedly ruined whatever wonderful friendship Spencer appreciates you for sharing with him, knowing your fate of a tear soaked pillow awaits you the second you arrive home. 

“(Y/N), wait, please!” Spencer calls out after you, his voice alone strong enough to stop you on your march. 

Turning to face him, Spencer’s heart breaks at the sight of the tears escaping your eyes. “Spencer, I am so, so sorry. I know you don’t like physical contact, I know you have never so much as glanced at me in the only way I’ve ever been able to look at you, and I want you to know I tried absolutely everything to stop myself falling for you because I didn’t want to put you in an uncomfortable situation like this, but every new thing I learn about you just makes me love you more than I thought possible and every time you smile at me you remind me what the definition of beautiful is, as though I’d ever forget when you exist to be just that in every conceivable way, and I’m so sorry or making you worry and care for me and that now you’ve got no choice but to process all of this and with your eidetic memory you’re not going to be able to forget it which makes things even more awkward for you and-”

Spencer interrupts your breathless, tearful ramble by pulling you into his arms, tucking your head into his chest.

“Breathe, (Y/N), please.” He asks, so softly, with such care and compassion you can only cry into his coat. 

For a few minutes, that is how you stay, crying in his arms as he holds you there, gently shushing you, one hand rubbing your back and the other holding your head to his chest, his fingertips caressing your hair in a way that makes it very difficult for you to focus on anything else. But, when Spencer hears your tears settle into sniffles, your breaths returning to normal, he parts his lips to speak.

“500 years through time and space.” He says, a small smile curling at the corner of his mouth.

Unfortunately, in your heartbroken state, you don’t quite catch on. “Yeah, friends have always got to be kind and appreciate each other, I remember.” You nod, pulling away from Spencer to wipe your eyes. 

As your vision clears, you see the smile on his face, and Spencer shakes his head at you. “The saying is specifically tailored to soulmates, I only added the friendship clarification because I didn’t want to be too forward.” He holds your gaze, reading your eyes as you return to the wavelength you’ve always shared. “Actually, the next fact I was going to tell you when you came out of the bathroom, the new fact you asked for on your return, was going to be that a study conducted by the University of California found that when someone is in love, their heartbeat synchronizes itself with that of the person they are in love with. And I was, then, going to ask to check your heart-rate, because I am a Doctor, after all.” He chuckles bashfully, pulling the stethoscope from his bag and shyly hiding it in there again once you acknowledge it.

There’s no way you can keep your cool at this point, the bright smile on your face is impossible to conceal. “How long have you had that stethoscope in there in preparation for telling me that fact?”

Spencer does not hesitate with his answer. “4 months, 18 days and 6 hours.”

You nod slowly. “So, you’ve been sure for a while, then?”

Spencer nods back at you, his own smile widening. “For 4 months, 18 days, 6 hours and 3 minutes, to be exact.”

You can’t help giggling at that. “500 years, 4 months, 18 days, 6 hours, and 3 minutes later, here we are. Sorry, I took the long way round.” You joke, taking a nervous step towards him, and Spencer meets you halfway. 

“I think we both did.” His words are quiet, his breath on your lips as he leans down to you, smile to smile and heart to heart for the first time in your lives. 

It’s you that rises to your tiptoes to close the final gap between you, your lips meeting his and immediately sighing against them, truly feeling that you have waited each and every one of those 500 years for this kiss alone. Spencer’s large hands cup your face so gently, and your hands hold his there, stars and butterflies whirling around you in a bliss shared between two souls that took their sweet time in coming back to each other. 

As a thought enters your mind, you break away from the kiss to laugh lightly.

“What is it?” Spencer asks quietly, but he’s already laughing with you.

“Two hearts, beating together?” You say, giggling to yourself as the realization flashes in Spencer’s eyes, too, so much so that he finishes the thought for you.

“You’re absolutely right, that is a bit Doctor-Who!”

[starillusion13]

Stay with me

request: "can you do a yungi x y/n one where they're in college together kinda like a childhood bsf to lovers but poly?"

Pairing: Yunho x reader x Mingi

Genre: Fluff, Friends to lovers, College Au

Warnings: they are caring bestfriends to you, mention of insult/body shaming in public by your family, reader feeling insecure, isolation, hints of skipping meals, childhood love and mention school bully and violence (just few words). Just a cute friendship to love.

W.C: 4.5k

Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated. Spread love not hate. My first Yungi fic😁.

Network: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity

Now let's take a moment to appreciate my dear friend @dreamsoffanfics Thanks for helping me out and being my proofreader. A dear friend indeed <3.

"She isn't coming again today..." Yunho said and sat beside his friend. The other glanced at him and looked over at your place beside him where you usually sit.

It's been weeks that you were skipping university classes without any proper reason, just texting them that you are not feeling well or you have some important stuff to do. But not clearly explaining anything — that even you are texting them the next day. They are sick and worried for you as it's normal for your childhood best-friends to be like this.

Whenever they ask you to go to your place, you quickly respond with a negative message that you have somewhere to go or someone to meet.

Nobody knows what's the actual matter with you.

"Do you think we should go over to her place and check on her?" Mingi asked while tapping the pen on the desk.

Yunho nodded before pulling out his phone to check for your message but nothing was there to his disappointment. "I am really worried about her. She has never been like this. I don't know why but after returning from her hometown, she is acting weird."

"Did her parents tell her anything again?" Mingi rested his elbow on the table and leaned to his side.

Yunho made an unsure expression to his question and dropped his shoulders. He shook his head when he remembered the last interaction with you when he met you at the convenience store.

…..

"Y/n, why don't you say no to your parents directly? I'm sure that they won't be denying it."

You sighed and turned towards him before picking up the nearest packet of chips in the basket,"And you think that? You are so wrong, Yuyu. They don't care about my opinions."

"But you can try explaining them. I'm sure they will understand." Yunho placed a milk package in the basket to which you glared at him and he sent you his puppy eyes, "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"That's a baby milk product."

"But you are still a baby." He said and held back his laugh.

This was his common teasing with you in every place and anytime you are having any serious conversation with him and whatever, however and whenever you are with him. You would feel relying on him the most. The bestest friend indeed. There’s a continuous warmth radiating from him for which you feel loved and secured. His big frame whenever he engulfs you in a hug, there’s a silent promise to you — that no matter what he would be there for you.

…..

He sighed when he imagined your face – irritated but laughing with him for the last time that day. After that day, you went to your hometown as it was the end of exam season and you didn’t meet your family for a long time. Last break, you were sick and had so many pending projects for several events that you opted for staying back on campus and completing them before it was too late.

It was late afternoon when they both finally had their last class and packed up their bags to leave the university. Anyways, they were not actually planning to stay there though. Mingi texted you a lot of times during the classes but some you ignored and to some, you replied with one word or just some common usual replies.

They both checked the timing and went towards the parking lot. Yunho took out the keys from his jacket’s pocket and Mingi was quick to enter the passenger seat. Both of them were in a hurry. They were eager to meet you. Before starting the engine, Yunho sighed deeply. A look of worry was visible on his face.

“I hope she is fine.”

Mingi nodded and patted his shoulder, “I’m sure, she is.”

…….

“Yah! Min…did you just eat my snacks yesterday?” stomping your feet, you reached the living room and stood in front of said man and glared at him.

He was so into the video game that he didn’t see your anger but just waved his hand and tried to push you aside. You hit his hand and the controller fell from his hold and sulkily he looked at your face.

“I was about to win the game.” He whined and leaned back into the couch.

“And I am about to eat you if you don't give me my snacks back.”

“Which one?” He furrowed his brows and crunched up his nose. “I’m gonna tell Yunho to buy them for you on his way back home.”

“No. Why’ll he buy it? You ate them and it’s your responsibility to buy them. And you know very well which snacks I’m talking about.” You pulled him up and dragged him towards the door, he was whining on his way but you ignored him and gestured to him to hurry up. “Don’t give me faces.” You folded your hands.

“But that store is far away.”

“And you know how to drive.”

……

While driving to your place, they stopped by some places to buy flowers, chocolates, ice cream and your favorite foods. When Yunho took a box of chocolates, he smiled at the thought of your smiling and excited face after receiving it. He puffed his cheeks and grabbed some other things as well.

Similarly, Mingi was smiling all the way when he bought your favorite ice-cream. He knew how you would jump on your feet after seeing it. He couldn't content his own happiness while buying it.

Apart from all these, they still called you to check on you. Yeah, after ignoring a few calls, you finally decided to pick up. The line was silent at first but then they heard shuffle sounds from the other side, Yunho was quick to speak into the call.

“What are you doing, y/n?” His voice was soft yet demanding.

They heard your deep sigh before your voice, “I don’t know.”

“What do you mean by you don’t know?”

“If I was really doing something then I could have told you. I was just laying on my bed and …..thinking.”

Actually, that was the main thing, they wanted to know whether you were at your apartment or not. If they would have asked you directly, then you could have got the hint of them wanting to come over to your place and you would have quickly made up a reason to avoid them.

Why actually were you avoiding them in the first place?

“Okay, then keep laying down and think.”

Yunho glared at Mingi at his weird reply but the latter just blinked at the phone in his hold and at him. They heard your chuckle and a little smile appeared on their faces. Atleast, you laughed— maybe a little.

“Why did you call me? Where are you both?”

“We are–”

Yunho cut Mingi’s answer, “hanging out.”

“Oh…okay. Have fun!” you tried to sound more enthusiastic but they could feel the sadness.

They didn’t drag the conversation because they knew that in a few minutes, they would be at your place and then you couldn’t ignore them or their questions. And this time, they would be surely erasing all your worries and sadness.

.

.

.

Almost after fifteen minutes, you heard your doorbell ring. You groaned at the thought of someone coming to your place at this time and you glared at your bedroom door. You got up from the bed and yawned before stepping in front of the mirror. You made a disgusted face at your reflection and combed your hair with just your fingers.

The bell rang again and you scoffed before mumbling under your breath while making your way towards the main door.

“Let me see whether I look like a human or not or it won't be my fault if you get scared.”

You peeked through the peephole and you were surprised to see your bestfriends standing at your doorstep on the other side. You quickly opened the door and your round eyes were staring at them.

“You both? Here…now?” you asked but slowly moved aside to welcome them inside. Mingi gave you the flowers they bought for you and smiling, you took them. You noticed paper bags in their hand and after closing the door, you followed them to the kitchen when they placed the bags on the kitchen counter. You stood beside Mingi who gave you a bright smile and started taking out the items from the bag. Your eyes were recognizing each little thing was your favorite as if they bought things for a child who was whining for all their favorites.

He grabbed the ice-cream bucket and turned towards you, “This was the last box and I quickly bought it for you. I hope you won't be angry with me again if I ever eat your snacks.” he took the flowers from your hand and tugged them in the vase on the counter top.

“Mingi..” You groaned but quickly took the tub from his hand. You wasted no time and opened the lid. You watched Yunho place some things inside your refrigerator but he approached you with a red box in his hand. You furrowed your brows when he placed it in your free hand.

“Chocolates for my cutie.”

When you noticed the ribbon on top of the box, your eyes went wide, “Don't tell me you went to that store to buy this. This is so expensive.”

“But you are more expensive.” He said and raised a brow at you, challenging.

You laughed at his antics and shook your head, “You both are spoiling me too much.”

“Of course. We love to spoil you.” Mingi said with a smug look.

Your couch had a lot of clothes and books so you asked them to follow you to your bedroom. They both were quick to trail behind like lost puppies but they exchanged looks because they both were hesitant to ask you about the time after returning from your hometown.

Entering your bedroom, they found out that it looked like as if some disaster happened over there. You were never that messy and disorganized. You rolled your eyes at the mess but offered them the free space around the bed.

You scooted towards the headboard and they placed themselves close to you. You offered some chocolates to both of them and you scooped a spoon full of ice cream and put it in your mouth.

“This will always be my favorite.” You offered two separate spoons to them and extended your hand so that they could eat the ice cream. They took small bites.

“So why are you here suddenly? You didn’t even inform me before coming.”

“Because you wouldn’t have allowed us to come here like other days.” Mingi muttered and kept staring at you. Hearing those words from him, you avoided his eyes at any cost and looked down at your lap. You were guilty but also the reasons for which you were avoiding them were running across your mind.

You bit your lip and wanted to disappear from their gazes. But Yunho scooted closer to you. You felt his knees touching yours and his warm hands grabbed your chin to make you look at him.

“Look at me, Y/n. What’s the matter?”

You avoided his gaze but only to make eye contact with Mingi. You closed your eyes and cursed yourself for behaving like this. But no matter how you feel like running away from them, you still want to stay close. You want to hear their soothing voices talking to you. Spend time with them.

“Y/n…” Mingi pronounced your name softly.

You took a deep breath before looking at him and then to Yunho. Your eyes wandered around his face. A perfect, sweet, soft and confident person in front of you. Excellent in every aspect. Good looking, handsome and tall just like Mingi but who is more intimidating than him.

Yunho’s eyes wandered around your face, he was searching for your discomfort, your sadness and what was the reason you were ignoring him and his friend.

“Am I really not good?” You asked him in a hushed voice. Your shaky pupils and lips between your teeth was making him hesitant.

Why was he feeling that? Is he worried or angry? Angry with you? Because you ignored him all these last days?

“Who said that? You are the best.” Mingi rubbed your back and your body shivered under his touch. Yunho cupped your face in his palms and stared at you, urging you to speak more, “Tell us please. Why were you avoiding us?”

“I didn’t avoid you. I was thinking…”

“You think a lot. What were you even thinking?” His thumbs caressed your cheeks, slightly brushing your lips. Your tears were lining your eyes. You didn’t mind crying in front of them, you have cried before since middle school until now, you have cried to both of them but they never judged you.

But his heart was aching to see you like that, so vulnerable in his hold. You held his wrists tightly when he gave you a small smile.

“I’m feeling insecure lately. Don’t feel like doing anything.”

“Why?”

“This break, I went to a family function with my parents and all my other cousins were present there too.”

Both of them nodded and let you continue. You bit your lower lip and stuck it between your lips.

“They pointed out to me how I have gained weight and also I’m just an average student in my university unlike others there. They were all too pretty and all had boyfriends so they called me the ugly one. Maybe, I am really how they see me.”

“No Y/n, you are not. Don’t take those words to heart. Ignore them.”

“But I can’t, Mingi. Those words are hitting me as if I can still hear them telling me those things repeatedly. You know what's worse about this. My mom laughed with them, she was supporting their accusations.”

“I never liked your mom.”

You turned to Yunho when he said that and you raised your brows, “She didn’t like you either. She always thought that you were a bad influence on me. But she just let me be friends with you only because you are rich.” Then again you turned towards Mingi, “About you, she thought you were some sort of rebellious kid like a gangster because she always saw teachers complaining to your parents regarding your fights.”

“It’s your fault. You are the one who threatened me not to tell your mom that those students were disturbing you so when they didn't stop. I knew I had to beat them.” Mingi smiled after recalling those beautiful memories.

He added, “And that’s how we became friends. Remember?” You nodded while remembering those happy days. Yunho was holding your hands in his and Mingi patted your head, “We missed you these days. You were not talking with us.”

“I was searching for a boyfriend.”

“Really?” He asked you and hesitantly looked between Mingi and you, you felt him squeezing your hands. You nodded but sighed again, “Kidding. I was…isolating myself.”

“Why am I like this?” You asked with a whisper.

“But who would ever love to have an ugly girl like me as their girlfriend?”

“Like what sweetie?” Yunho questioned. ”And don’t even question yourself. You are perfect.”

You took a few seconds, collecting your thoughts. Yunho and Mingi wait patiently, Yunho running a soft hand through your hair and with his other one entangling his fingers with you. You inhaled softly and lifted your head up to make eye contact with both of them. Your mind was hazy with lots of thoughts.

“I feel so pathetic. I feel like I can’t ever do anything correctly. Why do I feel like this? I get overwhelmed by little work and this college stuff. I can’t handle the gossip about me and I feel like I fail at everything. It’s just… too much.” A tear slid down your cheeks and Yunho looked at you with eyes that held so many emotions.

He would do absolutely anything for you, if only it meant it would guarantee your happiness. Mingi was the same, he would again beat anyone for you. He would go to any extreme end just to ensure your well being and that you are smiling.

After all, Mingi first fell for you on the day when he first beat a boy who was making fun of you in front of the whole class. You were crying and he had enough, so he punched the guy across his cheek but the way you stared at him after that, even when he was getting scolded from the teacher, that's when he couldn’t help but smile at you and you gave your bright and wide smile.

That smile did something to him.

He fell in love with you. But you both were just kids.

So, you both became best friends.

Yunho was a transfer student who was a shy and quiet one in the beginning. And somehow they both were placed at the same bench, they quickly became friends. He joined the dance club after exactly one year of friendship with Mingi. Yunho was quick to become a social butterfly. He knew everyone around the school, mostly because of his dance club membership.

But there was this one thing. Even though he got compliments from others, he always wanted to hear your comments on his dance moves and if you ever said just a word like ‘good’, he would smile foolishly as if he achieved something. After every performance, he would search for you in the audience and could find you clapping excitedly at him with Mingi beside you.

You didn't know but whenever you were not around both of them their main topic was about you. They used to talk about you with admiration and love towards you. This was the main reason for them to become friends. And they followed you to the same university.

And they still think about you like that everyday.

“Oh Y/n, you’re not pathetic. Not at all. Everyone has different capabilities, and that’s completely fine. You have so many talents, so many amazing people around you who appreciate you. And you are so beautiful. You’re our girl aren’t you? The only one for us.” Yunho looked at you expectantly with an adoration in his eyes.

There was a look of worry on their faces similar to whenever you felt sick and he would rush to your place to take care of you and soon after Mingi comes with medicines and food.

You looked away, not meeting his eyes but Mingi caught your eyes and raised a brow. You quickly replied, “Yes, yes I am.”

His breath hitched when you said those words while staring at him. Both of their hearts felt warm but there was something more, they wanted to say. Something that they think of now is the right time. Maybe…there's also uncertainty in the air.

He beamed with delight. “That’s right baby, you’re our girl, and always will be.” Mingi added to his friend's words, ”We’re here to take care of you. I know things are hard, but I will do whatever I can to make it easier for you.” Your heart aches from the care you’re being shown. You love your bestfriends so much.

You hold so much love and respect for them that you’re not sure how to even contain it. You just feel like exploding with affection. When you again felt like crying on the thought, Mingi pushed a spoon full of ice cream in your mouth, “The ice cream is melting like you.”

“Mingi…” you whined with teary eyes. They both laughed at you when you snatched the tub from him and placed it on your lap.

“Y/n, can I ask you something? Please don’t hate me or him after this. But I really want to tell you this. Can I?” He asked.

“Of course, Yuyu. you can tell me anything.” Mingi wiped your tears and you smiled towards him before turning your whole attention on Yunho. Your eyes eagerly waited for him to say whatever he wanted and he glanced at Mingi who nodded and looked back at you. Yunho again held your hands, squeezed them a little and brought them to his lips. These sweet gestures were common to you from him but you felt so nervous this time. Your heart beat increased with every second.

Is he going to end your friendship after this? Are they tired of your dramatic breakdowns?

“Will you be our girl, Y/n?”

You blinked at him and looked at them confused, “Am I not already?”

Mingi chuckled, “Not that silly. Will you be our girl? Our girlfriend?......Please.” he whispered the last part.

For a moment, you thought that they were joking but when you found them staring at you expectantly, waiting for your answer.

“Are you joking?”

“No…”

You quickly turned around and hugged Mingi, “Please tell me. This is not a joke.”

“It’s not.”

“Then, am I dreaming?”

“No silly, you are not.”

You raised your head from his shoulder, he was still moving his hands up and down your back, “Yunho calls me sweetie and you call me silly. This is not fair.”

And here you go.

Mingi cupped your face in his hand and pressed a soft kiss in the middle of your forehead and smiled dearly at you, “You are my silly girl. My silly…only mine.”

Yunho rolled his eyes, “Don't gatekeeper her to yourself. We agreed to mutual this between us. I said ‘our’ specifically but you are saying only yours.”

You looked between both of them and licked your lips before muttering slowly, “Are you pitying me?”

“Y/n…” Yunho called your name with love and held your hands before shaking his head, “we all are different in our own ways. And you are perfect for us. We have seen the imperfect you…the real you. We have seen the ugly versions of you and also the pretty versions of you. But we loved the unfiltered version. The version which felt like you were mine. You are mine.”

“Why do I feel like you are calling me ugly but in a sweet way?”

“Maybe I am.”

“Yuyu…” You hit his arm and continued, “I will ask Mingi to beat you.”

He scoffed, “He can't because he is too weak.”

The latter laughed when you stuck out a tongue at his friend.

“But……isn’t it wrong for both of you to love me? What will others think?”

“I don’t care about others. Are you uncomfortable with this? Say it, Y/n. Are you?”

You shook your head when Mingi turned your face to him, “We want to hear you. Say it please.”

“No. I’m not. I’m happy……I like both of you.” You muttered under your breath.

“What? I can’t hear you. Did you hear something, Yunho?” Mingi creased his forehead and asked his friend who pulled you on his lap and leaned your back on his chest and held both of your hands in front and rocked you in his hold. “No, Mingi I didn’t hear anything.”

“Yeah. because I didn't say anything.”

They both started laughing loudly when they saw you shyly looking down and Yunho rested his chin on top of your head, “But I love my sweet girl the most.” he placed a kiss and softly confessed, “I love you, Y/n.”

You held his hand and played with his fingers. You felt him nuzzling into your hair when you closed your eyes and smiled, “I love you too, Yunho.”

Mingi scooted closer, sitting in front of you he cupped your face and you quickly looked at his face expectantly when he confessed, “I love my silly girl. I love you so much, Y/n.”

“And I hate my snacks thief. I love you toooooo, Mingi.”

He chuckled and pressed a soft kiss on your forehead and nose, filled with overwhelming love and care.

“Now come on, Y/n. I know you aren’t eating properly these days. So let’s eat the food we bought for you earlier.”

“ I don’t want to eat. I’m not hungry.” You smiled brightly and looked at them with a fake pout.“But thank you for all the love and care. I’m so full with it.”

“Uh uh, don’t give me that look. You’re eating, and that’s the end of this conversation.” He said in a stern voice before standing up. You crawled away from him when Mingi caught you in his arms and stood up holding you bridal style and heading to the kitchen, trailing behind Yunho who was singing your favorite song.

Mingi placed you at the table, letting you watch the other one prepare plates. You were swinging your legs back and forth, already feeling so much better and humming the song with him. Mingi went back into the bedroom and came back with the ice cream tub to put into the fridge and sat next to you. He joked and sometimes said some nonsense to make you laugh and you giggled uncontrollably.

He could see the little you laughing with him in the classroom.

“You are finally mine, Y/n. The girl I adored and loved for all these years. The girl whose smile I love the most is smiling at me and sitting with me not as a friend but as my girlfriend.” He held your hand and kissed your knuckles.

“I’m so happy that my bestfriend is my boyfriend and you are the one who can only annoy me and steal my snacks. Oh wait! You have to buy me more snacks now or I am breaking up with you.” You faked a shocked expression.

“Not sorry to disturb you but she is our girlfriend. My best supporter. Here comes the food.” Yunho swirled on his feet and placed the food dramatically on the table, having the silliest look on his face.

You screeched with laughter. “Yunho, my jealous baby.” He sat across from you and pushed the plates towards you both.

“Oh? Now I’m your baby. Last time I checked it was you who bought baby milk products. ” He grabbed his fork and pointed at you with squinted eyes as if he’s in deep thought. You let out a scoff at his antics and he raises an eyebrow at you, “I didn't. You were annoying me.”

“Oh…okay..now let’s talk less and eat more..”

You excitedly nodded and dug into the food. Their eyes followed your actions and they shared looks between them with little smiles appearing on their faces. They nodded towards each other and started eating the food with you.

And they promised to themselves that no matter what the situation is, they will always stay by your side. They still kept the friendship letter from you which you gave them for the first time during Christmas and they would always fulfill your wish.

‘Stay with me……always.’

Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @hwanring @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon @hyuukah @kazscara @aceofspadesbiofalltrades @nvdhrzn @meowmeeps @vtyb23 @haechansbbg

[open!]

[alonetimelover]

pairing: Harry Styles x scientist(physicist)!reader

summary: There is this one professor at Oxford that can explain physics theorems with help of POP culture. What happens when she uses Harry's music to explain one of the themes?

a/n: It took me definitely much more time than I anticipated... I hope I didn't butchered the theorem explanation in this fic (if so, make me aware, please).

masterlist

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Messages between Jeff and Harry

reyJeff sent an attachment somehow you're useful for science...

my responsibility what is it? last time you sent me a link I got an hour long scolding from my mum and she's somewhere in the house

reyJeff nothing bad this time just some professor is explaining a theorem while using your music she's good, i now know what is the Higgs mechanism

my responsibility there's no way you understand physics, they must be a miracle worker... I'll check the video out see you tomorrow at the office? reyJeff reacted to the message

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TikTok

“But, Dr YSN, the Higgs mechanism does not make sense?” said or rather asked the voice behind the recording phone. 

“Syrup allegory did not help at all?” Dr YSN turned from the blackboard, looking directly at the asking student. 

“I mean, I understand that when the Universe’s temperature cooled down the Higgs field condensed in all volume and scattered across it like a fog. But what and how and - ugh - why?” The student grew impatient and angry in her incomprehension. 

“It’s okay, Lauren. I understand that this subject wasn’t the one you expected while choosing to study biology. And unfortunately it is important, it will help you connect quite a few dots while learning about cell division and bioprocesses. But going back to the Higgs problem.” Doctor cleared her throat and stood near her desk. One hand holding onto the oak surface, drumming her fingers in thought of how to help those young people. 

“Dr YSN," interrupted her thought process some other student. "If the particles are getting stuck why not photons?” They connotated the allegory that Dr YSN wanted to primarily help them with understanding.

“It all comes to the mass of the particle, and just like you all know now - photons do not have mass. They are, according to quantum mechanics, a portion of energy. Yes?”

The whole room nodded their heads, suddenly remembering the lecture from just two days ago. 

“Okay, now back to the Higgs problem. Do you guys have a favourite artist?”

The lecture room erupted with not so hushed whispers about who should tell the name of their idol. Doctor patiently waited for one of the young men to grow courage and speak up. 

“Harry Styles?”

“Perfect!” Exclaimed lecturer. “Now, do we have people here that do not like Mr Styles’ music?”

On the screen overlooking more than enough of the lecture room could be seen a few of raised hands (a definite minority).

“Okay, listen carefully. We’re imagining it now."

Doctor strolled from behind her desk and moved forward as to be closer to her students.

"Let’s say that Mr Harry Styles’ music is our Higgs field. Can you do that? Amazing. Now, when he got his latest album out it spread around the world. Everyone liked it, right?"

Seeing some of the student nodding their heads, she exclaimed, "not right. You," she pointed at the student that previously raised their hands. "You all didn’t know. And that's why you are photons in our experiment. Photons, like we already relearned today, are without mass and in our example they are without love or interest in Mr Styles’ music. Everything is clear for now?”

After getting an approval of nodding heads, YN anyway moved to the blackboard and wrote:

mass = love for Mr Styles' music

photons = not-fans of Mr Styles' music

“Fantastic. Any particle that has some mass, so love for that music, will find itself stuck. You’re stuck because you love that music -” she pointed to the student that had said Harry’s name, “- so you listen to it, analyse and appreciate. The appreciation grows with love so the resistance grows with mass."

appreciation = resistance

"All in all, the current love is the measure of appreciation. So?”

“The current mass of the particle is the measure of resistance that the Higgs field can withstand,” said almost everyone present in the room, making the doctor smile from ear to ear. She had already written it down on the board.

“Excuse me? If Harry’s music is the Higgs field then Harry alone is the Higgs particle - the God Particle, right?” Asked someone from the first row.

“That is correct. Excellent, Madeline! Now, you all understand the basics of the Higgs mechanism and field?” 

view all comments

wtf, how did i just understand physics???? im a sociology major

can we talk about how she took her time to explain instead of yelling for not understanding? it's sad that we need to point that out

harry + physics ??? never thought i would experience it

as a physics student - WHY CAN'T I HAVE THIS LECTURER?? - she's soooo good

im 15 and understood this shit, holy moly

it's going viral so HELLO HARRY i know that someone sent it to him and he's sitting under his little blanket, watching it

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Instagram

scienceandharstyles

liked by harrysmoustache, harrystyles and 23 381 others

scienceandharstyles I don't know how many of you know but my physics lecturer is literally the 'viral Higgs professor'. Today, after the lecture, she was kind enough to explain to me this awful mathematics (I hate maths) even though it was late (8:30 PM) and she had plans. I just thought I would post about it here (I have her consent for uploading this photo) to show how amazing she is.

view all 3 032 comments

sciencestudent we need more professors like her!

harryupdates I'd love to have this type of lecturers at my Uni...

�� scienceandharstyles she really is amazing! after a few examples she wanted me to do to see if i understood the topic, she just flawlessly moved the convo towards my interests, like??? she's so attentive and warm and sweet? i obviously started talking about harry...

hArrysbtch does she know how tiktok is simping over her???

⤷ scienceandharstyles she said that as long as people could take something from those videos, she didn't mind

⤷ hArrysbtch tbh i don't blame those people... she's gorgeous

harrysmylife HARRY LIKED

helloitsharry guys, remember that tiktok account we thought was harrys? maybe it is and he started it just to watch her videos??

⤷ hArrysbtch no way... it makes sense. i checked and that account liked almost all videos that are about dr ysn

⤷ harrysmoustache plus it was created around the time the first video of her started going viral. coincidence? i think not!

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harryupdates

liked by hArrysbtch, scienceandharstyles and 43 492 others

harryupdates HARRY was seen arriving at the Oppenheimer's after party in London!!!

view all 2 201 comments

hArrysbtch him and Nolan are besties. CONFIRMED

harrysmoustache wearing all black??? he knows it's serious

⤷ harrysfan82 did you want him to wear pink?

⤷ harrysmylife harry would be able to pull that off

scienceandharstyles guys, my professor was the consultant on that movie!!!!

⤷ harrysmoustache you mean THE professor? the higgs professor???

⤷ scienceandharstyles yes! she and one of our older professors were providing knowledge for the director and actors on set. Dr YSN was working with Nolan since he started writing the script!

⤷ hArrysbtch i need them together. i need to know everything about them interacting

⤷ harrysmoustache can you imagine harry trying to justify him literally stalking all those videos of her explaining her lectures??

⤷ hArrysbtch ohhhh, id die to be next to them while they were talking!!!!

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harryupdates

liked by scienceandharstyles, hArrysbtch and 58 303 others

harryupdates HARRY AND DR YN YSN at the after party!

view all 4 402 comments

hArrysbtch NO WAY

hArrysbtch look at his face!!!! he was blushing!!!!

hArrysbtch she's so beautiful 😍

scienceandharstyles the god particle and his creator!

harrysmoustache i need videos to see if he was shy 🤭 if so, i know for sure he has a BIG crush on her

harrysmylife guys there was a video going all over twitter! after he was introduced to dr yn and the other professor, she was like, "i've never thought i would see the god particle in person"

⤷ hArrysbtch oh she was flirting too

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scienceandharstyles

liked by harryupdates, hArrysbtch and 34 201 others

scienceandharstyles guys, i met harry today....

view all 2 589 comments

scienceandharstyles ok, story time! 1) it was at this very cute cat cafe in Oxford, very close to my campus. they serve those beautiful coffee with drawn cats on the foam!! super cute! but back to the story, i was just petting one of the cats - Murphy - when i heard the bells. and I am super noisy and needed to know who entered the cafe

scienceandharstyles 2) i looked up and it was dr YSN (tiktoks higgs professor but i really don't like calling her that). when she saw me she just immediately walked up to me and asked if she could seat with me while she waited for her friend to arrive. i, of course, agreed (i literally love her).

scienceandharstyles 3) she then helped me with some of my work for uni (maths again...) and while explaining she was so attentive and asked about my day. she asked if i got the tickets for the concert i wanted (i didn't say it was for harry) and when I said I did, she was so happy for me!

scienceandharstyles 4) after about 30 minutes of talking someone else entered the cafe and, you guessed it, it was harry. what's more, he walked up to us because HE WAS THE FRIEND MY RPOFESSOR WAS WAITING FOR. he greeted her with a hug and introduced himself to me. i was so shocked i couldn't form a sentence. dr ysn helped me calm down and said a few words for me.

scienceandharstyles 5) they both then moved to the other table to actually enjoy their time together. but before that harry offered to take the photo with me but only if he could wear my hat!!!! yeah, it was a wild day

hArrysbtch oh, that's first date harry, I'm telling you

harryupdates madeline im so happy for you!

harrysmoustache if he dressed like that for our first date, i wouldn't be able to form a sentence... he looks so handsome

harrysmoustache AND HE HAS THE MOUSTACHE AGAIN, LET'S RAISE MOUSTACHE STANS

harrysmylife the tattoos, the chains, the nail polish, the hat, the bicep????? im dead

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physics_oxford

liked by scienceandharstyles, harrystyles and 10 301 others

physics_oxford Dr YN YSN would like to invite 'anybody that craves knowledge' to the open lecture about Robbert J Oppenheimer's work described in the film Oppenheimer. As the science consultant during the filming, Dr YSN invited the writer and director of the movie - Christopher Nolan, as well as the lead actor - Cillian Murphy. We cannot wait to see you next Friday at the main hall!

view all 982 comments

scienceandharstyles Can't wait to attend this!

⤷ yourinstagram Can't wait to see you, Madeline! ❤️

student21 Dr YSN to the rescue to everyone that didn't understand the movie!!!

studen45 it's amazing that more people can experience the brilliance of Dr YSN teaching! Great move from the Dean.

harrysmoustache i think im going there... fingers crossed

student23 CILLIAN???

harrysfan21 i bet that harry's attending it!

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harryupdates

liked by hArrysbtch, harrysmoustache and 46 502 others

harryupdates HARRY arriving at Dr YN YSN lecture at Oxford University!

view all 4 201 comments

hArrysbtch who predicted that???

harrysmoustache HARRY AND CILLIAN REUNION

harrysmylife we stay winning, my soldiers

stylesbabie he looks good 🫠

harrysfan82 he's so supportive of dr ysn

hArrysbtch scienceandharstyles were you there???

⤷ scienceandharstyles i was!!! and he literally greeted me by my name?? like, he remembered... After the lecture ended he waited for dr ysn and others from the panel and left with them! even gave me a wave then!

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harryupdates

liked by scienceandharstyles, harrysmylife and 56 492 others

harryupdates HARRY VIA DELETED IG STORIES !!!

view all 5 011 comments

hArrysbtch can you guys imagine what he's posting to his close friends ig stories? I WANT TO BE THERE

harrysmoustache the hugging sticker???

harrysmylife i love how he appreciates dr ysn way of showing that she cares... i love then

scienceandharstyles that was my latest lecture with dr ysn! it was a tough one, im wondering how Harry understood it

⤷ stylesbabie what was it about?

⤷ scienceandharstyles literally, bunch of maths equations that we need to understand and then use in practice!

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yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, annetwist and 310 others

yourinstagram this is what i'm dealing with instead of checking the papers and giving grades...

view all 34 comments

annetwist He's going to break his neck one day!

⤷ yourinstagram please, tell him, Anne. he's not listening to me...

⤷ harrystyles I am well coordinated, thank you.

gemmastyles he has some connections with your students. be careful, ynn

⤷ yourinstagram they all love him! im already loosing!

yourbestfriend glad to see those plants alive

⤷ yourinstagram thank you, im a very good plant mommy

harrystyles who is this dancer? he seems exeptional.

⤷ yourinstagram remember the book about ego i wanted to lend to you?

⤷ jeffazoff ohhhh, burnt to ashes!

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harryupdates

liked by scienceandharstyles, hArrysbtch and 23 301 others

harryupdates HARRY was seen at the Oxfords library!!

view all 2 402 comments

hArrysbtch oh wattpad girlies open the documents and write about professorry!!!!

harrysmoustache it's giving dark academia

scienceandharstyles guys, he's literally hanging out at our campus. it's so cute!

⤷ harrysmylife is he there often?

⤷ scienceandharstyles yes! a few times a week. he's bringing lunch or coffee to dr ysn office. sometimes they have lunch together somewhere on the campus. he's now treated here just like any other student. most people don't even pay attention to him!

⤷ harryupdates im so glad people don't bother them

⤷ user46 is it even allowed?

⤷ scienceandharstyles if he's doing it, there must be the dean's consent!

stylesbabie he even dresses like those old-school professors!

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yourbestfriend

liked by yourinstagram, harrystyles, scienceandharstyles and 32 492 others

yourbestfriend Dr YN YSN reading her graduate's research paper and finding out that they, indeed, included her boyfriend as one of the examples.

view all 5 402 comments

yourinstagram I am a PROUD supervisor!!!

harrystyles I am, indeed, helping science. Will I also get a Nobel prize?

⤷ yourinstagram No, baby. You won't.

⤷ harrystyles :(((

scienceandharstyles ohhhh god!!! my thesis!!!

⤷ yourinstagram I sent you an email with all comments about the paper, Madeline. You are on the right track! ❤️

hArrysbtch she is SOOO BREATHTAKING

⤷ harrystyles agreed.

⤷ hArrysbtch Harry?!

user492 Isn’t it confidential?

⤷ scienceandharstyles Well, they didn't say whose paper was it. I commented that, and I don't mind people knowing. Besides, it will be published soon.

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wired

liked by yourinstagram, harrystyles and 381 492 others

wired It's been only 12 hours and our newest video of Dr YN YSN answering your questions has over 2,5M views! Should I (the intern) ask THE boss for PART 2? Link in bio.

view all 10 391 comments

yourinstagram It was an absolute pleasure to film this video! I wouldn't be opposite to doing a part 2 👀

harrystyles Boycotting! There was no God particle!

⤷ yourinstagram So, part 2?

⤷ harrystyles Part 2.

harrystyles The best Doctor out there! 👸🏻

⤷ yourinstagram ❤️❤️

scienceandharstyles our dr is getting famous!!!!

harryupdates Woah, this video singlehandedly is convincing me to change majors!

user49 one of the best videos in the series!

user78 Can't remember seeing someone being this enthusiastic about physics theorems.

yourbestfriend bestie getting famous... i love it

⤷ yourinstagram thanks to you and encouraging me!

⤷ harrystyles *clearing throat*

⤷ yourinstagram and thanks to my wonderful, one and only, best in the whole world boyfriend

⤷ hArrysbtch oh he loves attention!

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a/n: would you like to see more of physicist!reader?

[senditcolton]

Request: Mean Marty smut. Because “we’re a bad idea” is completed (loved the character progression in that last chapter, by the way), there’s a good chance Lamoriello isn’t re-signing him and Clutter, and this entire off-season has hurt my heart. Dealer’s choice on the content.

- 💛

I'm Not Sentimental, but...

a/n: considering the way I managed to write all of this in a single night I feels just proves how much I kind of missed writing smut. why is it always this man to pull me back to smut writing? the world may never know. inspired by this moodboard by @smileysvech, this ask from a previous thirst night, and this proposal from @comphy-and-cozy, (not sure if you'll get the full epic, but here's a little taste)

Song Inspo: "Billie Bossa Nova" by Billie Eilish Word Count: 5k Warnings: smut. sugar daddy/baby dynamics, bondage, sensory deprivation, oral (m receiving), sex toys, overstimulation, dirty talk, and just general depravity... I'm going to hell, it's fine.

Aman. Premiere Suite. Ten o’clock. Sharp.

That was the four sentence text message Matt Martin had sent you earlier today. A text message that you had been repeating in your head almost religiously, as if being able to recite it from memory would make him forgive you for the fact that it was now 10:15 and you were still a block away.

Hell, being able to recite the message would most likely get you into even more trouble.

Instead of memorizing the now irrelevant text, you should’ve been practicing a rehearsed speech of excuses to tell him when you finally did arrive: your boss kept you at work for longer than expected, you had to stop at your house to get ready, dressing to the parameters that Matt had set in the text massage prior to the one rattling in your brain. Anything that would transfer the blame from you onto someone else. But you knew it would be pointless.

Matt loved reminding you that you were capable of anything. A reminder that was uplifting when brought up in conversations about the education he was helping pay for. A reminder that was shameful when he said it in that degrading tone that made you weak in the knees.

When the two of you had agreed to this dynamic all those months ago, you knew what you were signing up for. Being a sugar baby wasn’t for the meek. That statement was only amplified when you added Matt Martin to the equation.

After all, no sane person would willingly agree to trudge down New York City streets in a set of highly risqué lingerie, the only protection between you and indecent exposure being a long tan trench coat.

Yet… here you were.

A sigh of relief whooshes out of you when you see the neon sign of the hotel ahead, your pace quickening as if that would make up for lost time. You try to keep an air of confidence about you as you walk into the lobby, your heels clicking on the tile floor. The song-and-dance at the front desk is blissfully short – only the words ‘premiere suite’ needed to fall from your mouth before someone is escorting you to the private elevator. You step inside, the doors closing and you watch the LED numbers increase, your heartrate rising with it.

You were so late. You were in so much trouble. But, instead of the dread you should’ve felt at the thought of facing Matt’s disappointment, there was a thrum of excitement running through you.  

It wasn’t anything to lie about. In fact, Matt often liked to tease you, asking if you broke the rules on purpose because you liked the punishment. Whenever he asked, both you and he knew that there was no denying the truth.

It was a deliciously predictable game of cat-and-mouse. You knew exactly how far you could push and he knew exactly how much you could take. It was a transaction, like every other part of your arrangement. And while some might think that knowledge would dampen the mood, it actually just made it even more intoxicating.

The elevator finally stops, the doors opening directly into the suite – an elegantly decorated room decked in the blacks and beiges that screamed bougie. You step forward, out of the elevator, your heels sinking into the carpet as your eyes dart around the room, looking for Matt. You eventually spy the outline of his tall frame in front of the opened bay doors, the cool air streaming in from the balcony, fluttering the curtains. He has his back to you, his arms crossed and you see an empty whiskey glass dangling from his fingers.

He knew you were there. He had to have known that you were there, the elevator ding when you arrived being anything but subtle. Yet, he didn’t acknowledge you – just kept staring out at 5th Avenue.

Perhaps against your better judgement, you decide to break the silence with a gentle whisper of his name but before you could add another word to the single syllable sentence, his voice cuts you off.

“What time is it?”

It’s a somewhat rhetorical question but one that demands an answer nonetheless. He knew the time but more importantly, he knew that you knew the time. But he wanted you to acknowledge it – admit your failings – and that delectable shame causes the heat to rise in your cheeks.

“10:28,” you whisper out and your quiet admission has Matt turning to face you. He looks good, like always. The white button-down shirt is cut perfectly to his body, the black of his slacks and his tan tie making it seem like he belonged in this room. Everything about him screamed power and luxury, from the Windsor knot still snug below his throat, to the Rolex on his wrist, to his cufflinks glinting in the low lamplight.

“10:28,” he repeats. He moves forward, quickly abandoning his glass on a nearby table, his now empty hands coming to grip your chin and tilt your head back to lock your eyes with his. “It’s like you don’t want to see me,” he muses, the dangerous sparkle in his irises only hinting at what was to come.

“Of course, I do,” you rebut, the pleading edge to your voice sounding almost too sickly sweet to even your ears. “But –”

Whatever words you had poised to fall from your lips are silenced by Matt pulling your face towards him to crash his lips against yours. You should hate how much you melt under his touch, how willingly you open your mouth to allow his tongue to have access. But you don’t. It was nearly impossible to hate Matt Martin, even when his lips disappear from yours.

“No excuses, sweetheart. We both know any excuse you have could be resolved if you just let me take care of you entirely,” he whispers, his thumb brushing along your jawline.

The proposal isn’t new; it’s one that he had casually suggested almost every night since your arrangement started. It was also pointless to argue with him because he was telling the truth. He had enough money to make it so you could exist to only be on his arm and at his beck and call. But that wasn’t the life you had envisioned. He knew that. He respected that.

This was your boundary for him; one that he liked to toy at but you knew he would never cross.

“I know,” you whisper, having no other answer to give him. It seems to be enough, that lazy smug smile appearing on his face; the one that had Islander fans cheer and opponents sneer when he was playing. One that occasionally appeared in press conferences he attended as Assistant General Manager. It signals an end to the conversation and acts as a segue into the inevitable.

His hands fall from your face, moving to your coat as he deftly unties the long belt from its cinched position around your waist. The material slips from your frame with a surprising ease, leaving you clad in the lingerie he requested – the set he bought you a week ago. The undergarments are more for decoration than actual function, considering the only coverage on your chest was a pair of satin ribbons and the fabric around your hips disappeared when it came time to cover your core.

“Gorgeous,” he murmurs, his hands delicately tracing the lines of your body, toying with but not undoing the bows on your chest and hips. The sharp breath that he sucks in between his teeth at the sight of you makes the heat pool in your lower stomach.

“Wanted to make sure I looked perfect for you.”

“Think that will excuse you for being late?” he asks, that smirk reappearing as his head cocks to the side. You quickly shake your head in a negative (even though you hoped that flattery would get you out of whatever torture was to come), an action to which his only response is a deep chuckle.

He walks away from you for a moment, the space between Matt’s heat and your newly exposed body allowing the coolness of the night air to hit your skin. You watch him pick up the pale pink leather cuffs that you only now realized had been waiting for you on the table next to the whiskey glass he abandoned a few short minutes ago.

“Wrists.”

The single word is all it takes for you to present your hands to him, watching with baited breath as he wraps the material around your joints, buckling the hardware securely against your skin. You let him guide your arms behind your back, the click of the restraints locking together seemingly reverberating around your ribcage.

“Knees.”

It is somewhat ridiculous how single syllable words are all Matt needs to utter to have you obeying him perfectly. The descent to your knees is easy, the plush carpet forgiving, and your eyes glance up, tracking Matt’s movement as he walks back in front of you, towering over your body more than he usually did. His hands come to his neck, elegant fingers undoing his tie, allowing the material to now drape down either side of his collar. He continues to deconstruct the professional façade he was wearing like a mask, unbuttoning the top buttons of his dress shirt and removing the cufflinks to roll up his sleeves. His hands return to the silken material of his tie, pulling one side until it falls from his frame. It takes you an embarrassingly long time to realize his intentions with said material, a pout forming on your lips as he takes the fabric in both hands.

“Don’t give me that look, darling,” he coos as he moves the material towards your face, the stretch of fabric between his fists the perfect length to wrap around your head, the high-quality silk covering your eyes and plunging the room into darkness. You feel his adept fingers loop the material, careful not to get it tangled in your hair as he tugs a secure knot against the back of your skull.

“Felt like you didn’t want to see me tonight anyway,” he muses, his voice now becoming your only guide as he continues, “since you were almost a half-hour late.”

“I’m sorry,” you whine, knowing that the plea, no matter how pathetic, would fall onto deaf ears.

“I know, sweetheart.”

His reply is pitying but firm – a staple in the dynamic established between the two of you. Rules had been laid out and it was only befitting that when one was broken, a punishment followed.

Although, the sound of his belt buckle coming undone combined with the snap of the leather as it slipped from his belt loops didn’t sound like the beginnings of a punishment to you.

Your mouth opens with practiced ease, outstretching your tongue and submitting yourself to him in what you were sure looked like the most perfect bow-tied present. He chuckles and you feel his fingers grip your chin again before his thumb is pressing against the pink muscle of your tongue.

“That eager for me, aren’t you?”

You only response is to wrap your lips around the digit, gently suckling – just enough to tempt him into giving you the real thing. He laughs, his thumb slipping out of the wet cavern of your mouth before the sound of him unzipping of his dress pants causes your mouth to open again.

It is slight torture, waiting for him, not being able to see him and not being able to know what was coming and when it was coming. But that only heightened the excitement you felt when the delectable weight of his shaft came to rest on your outstretched tongue. You feel the appendage slide against you, the tip of it disappearing into your mouth – shallowly at first but slowly increasing its depth. You press your tongue against the bottom of his length, a silent indication that you were willing and ready to take all of him, one that Matt reads and responds to by holding the side of your head as his hips begin to move, thrusting into your mouth. You relax your throat, allowing him to slip deeper as he takes what he needs from your body, the filthy praise rolling from his lips while yours are otherwise occupied.

“Never get tired of this,” he groans from above you. “Never get tied of seeing your mouth wrapped around my cock. Of feeling your throat constrict around me. Such a good girl – such a pretty perfect slut for me.”

You can hear his words become stuttered, feel the steady rhythm of his thrusts turn staccato and it isn’t long until his climax comes, the feeling of his release filling your mouth almost as intoxicating as the taste of him. You suck, cleaning him with an eager deftness that has him groaning, a trill running through you. You wish you could see him – see the post-orgasm glow that alit his skin, see the way he pushes back the strands of hair that always fell over his forehead. For the first time since he took your sight away, it felt like a punishment.

He finally pushes back, the silky smoothness of his length removing itself from your mouth until a single string of silverly saliva is all that connects you. A laugh emanates from his chest as he takes you in, surely looking like a mess with the sheen of sweat on your skin, the spit on you lips, the track of tears escaping from underneath the makeshift blindfold.

“Y’look so beautiful. Gonna take a picture,” he mutters and you gently nod your head in consent.

You hear the click of a phone camera before Matt’s hands are back on your body, this time lifting you up off the ground before trailing down your arms to unclasp the restraints. He doesn’t remove the material from your eyes, leaving you still blind as he guides you further into the room. You allow him to manipulate your body, letting him push and turn you until he is gently pressing you back against the mattress of the king-sized bed, the sheets gliding against your skin. He guides your arms up over your head and your once again hear the click of the restraints although this time when you tug, the resistance you are met with is not your own wrists but a wooden bedframe.

Another whine escapes from you, the previous act of having him in your mouth only succeeding in making you even more desperate; something that Matt most likely knew, hence why he still prevented you from touching him or even seeing him. You are simply forced to wait in deprived silence, listening intently to every noise that hits your eardrums for indication on what was to come.

You hear the rustle of fabric, the zip of a zipper, and what you think is a small chuckle from Matt before you can feel his weight sink onto the mattress. Your thighs fall open of their own volition but Matt doesn’t tease you about it, instead happy to drink in the sight of your soaked core.

“Oh, that wet already, aren’t you sweetheart?” he asks and judging by the dampness you can feel on your skin, you can only imagine how lewd the display must appear. “Got this desperate from me fucking your face? Such a perfect slut, always ready for me.”

Another whimper falls from your lips, the rolling of your hips acting as both a confirmation that you wanted him and a silent plea for him to give you more than just his words. The sigh that escapes you when you feel him trace down your thigh is blissful, until you realize that it is not Matt’s rough calloused fingers slowly trailing towards your core, but instead a soft silicone.

“No, please,” you whimper out as Matt moves the toy closer to the apex of your thighs, the rounded head coming to glide against your slick folds. “Want you Matt. Want your cock.”

“You already got it tonight,” he whispers, the toy trailing up until the tip of it presses against your clit.

“Want your cock inside me.”

“You want me to fuck your perfect cunt? Want to feel me stretching that tight little pussy open?”

Your only response is a desperate whine as your hips buck, the action forcing the toy to bump against your bundle of nerves, causing your breathing to stutter. Matt holds the wand in place and you can feel him hovering over you, his breath fanning across your cheekbones.

“Then you should’ve been on time,” he whispers, his sentence punctuated by the click of the power button, the sudden vibrations forcing a downright pornographic moan to fall from your lips. He keeps the vibrator pressed firmly against you, the buzz of it filling the room.

Your already desperate state accompanied by the low and steady hum of the vibrator means that your climax hits you faster than expected, the warmth of it washing over your body as you whine and writhe against the sheets. Matt waits until your body is no longer trembling to remove the toy from your core before turning it off, returning the room to its former silence.

That should have been the end of it, the deprivation of touch, of sight, and of him, seeming to you like punishment enough. But when the head of the vibrator is pressed against your sensitive core again, your mind is left reeling.

Your confusion allows Matt to roughly grab your leg, pulling it closer until the firm length of the wand is pressed against the supple flesh of your inner thigh. The sensation is quickly followed by another, the feeling of a different material wrapping around the toy and your leg. It takes a minute to recognize the light scratch of the fabric as the belt that used to be looped around your trench coat.

“Wh- ” you begin to ask, the simple question not even being completed before Matt shushes you, his hands still working to wrap the belt around your skin.

His hand tugs at your other thigh until you can feel them press together, the sensation of your skin fully sticking to each other impeded only by the wand firmly held into place by your limbs. But the intention behind those registered touches doesn’t fully hit you until you feel the cinch of the belt tightening around both of your legs.

“Matt, please, don’t,” you beg, the understanding of what he was about to do hitting you like a freight train. Your wrists tug at your restraints, a mantra repeating in your brain that says he couldn’t possibly be this mean.

“What are you whining about, darling? I’m about to give you more pleasure than you probably deserve.”

You whimper, knowing that he had a point. He could’ve switched the entire script, going with the torture of edging you but never allowing you a release instead of the painful bliss of overstimulation. But you needed him. Not a toy, not an orgasm – him.

“I know you can take it, like the perfect whore you are,” he mutters, his fingers tracing over the ridges of your face, that depredating praise making another zing of desire flow through you, the arousal gushing from your core even more noticeable to you because of the bindings on your legs. “But if you don’t think you can, all you have to do is tell me.”

He is giving you a choice to end it here, to have him untie you and let him take care of you. But as much as you wanted him to coddle you, you wanted to earn it. Matt knew that – you were always looking to prove yourself to anyone – hence his phrasing. Another trick in his arsenal.

So, instead of the safe-word, another plea escapes your lips, your begging consent for him to continue. You can’t see it, but that grin pulls across Matt’s features once again, a smirk of both power and admiration aimed directly at you. His hand falls from your face, trailing a torturous path down your body before dancing across your bound thighs.

The vibrations that hit you are expected and yet somehow manage catch you entirely off-guard, your core still sensitive from your previous orgasm. A high-pitched moan crawls its way up your throat as your muscles clench, your back arching.

“There she is. There’s my good girl,” Matt whispers, his praise the only thing strong enough to cut through the haze that you felt slowly enveloping you. “Feels good, yeah?”

A pathetic whimper is the only response that you can give, the sensations assaulting your body rendering you essentially speechless. Usually, that was sufficient but Matt’s mean streak seems to be never-ending, the click of his tongue sounding throughout the room.

“No, sweetheart, I need your words.”

There is a proper answer – one that you learned quickly after you once said yes and that agreement led to even more discipline. Now, the words were caught in your throat, not because you didn’t know what to say but because it was difficult to even form a string of syllables that was in any way coherent.

“Not as good as you,” you manage to choke out, your sentence rendered choppy by the hiccups of gasps that you couldn’t hold back.

You feel the mattress shift, Matt’s weight disappearing and you have no shame in letting your protest be heard, a pitiful mewl ripping its way out of your throat. You can barely hear Matt’s chuckle before you register the mattress dipping again, this time on either side of your head. It’s the press of Matt’s lips against yours that has your second orgasm crashing over you, unabashed moans falling from your mouth into his, all of which Matt greedily swallows. The orgasm fades only briefly before your body writhes again, the restraints around your wrists and your legs holding you and the vibrator tight.

Matt’s lips disappear from yours, another strangled groan falling from your lips, the sound now only hindered by your dwindling sense of self-control.

“I’m going to take a shower,” you hear Matt explain. His voice is cruelly casual; it was as if he was discussing the weather, as if he wasn’t leaving you bound with the wand still humming between your thighs, abusing your oversensitive core. “I can see you trying to quiet all those pretty little noises you want to make. Let them out, sweetheart. I want to hear you – want all of New York to hear what a good little slut you are.”

You aren’t sure whether it is his encouragement or your own desire that erases any lingering shame you have in your body, your moans now falling freely. The only praise that Matt gives you is a quiet ‘there she is’ before you can sense his presence disappearing from the room, the confirmation coming in the sound of the showerhead turning on.

When your third orgasm thrums through your body, you realize that your current predicament was more of a challenge than anything else. Not just to have Matt hear you over the crash of the water but to even stay coherent enough to do so, a test you were starting to fail as you feel the weight of your sub-space prick at the corner of your eyes. You try to ground yourself by listing every sensation: the way the sheets dampen with sweat underneath you, the way the supple leather digs into your wrists, the cool breeze coming from the window dancing over your skin. But everything is slowly drowned out by the incessant buzz of the vibrator between your legs, still pressed against your clit, that constant stimulation forcing your body to writhe, your thighs to slicken, your chest to heave.

The noises that do manage to fall from you are a jumble compilation of sighs, moans, and curses, each less coherent with every orgasm that passes through you. It is the most delicious torture, the relief of a climax followed swiftly by the borderline pain of the vibrations still going. There is no quantifying anything: how long you’ve been here, how many orgasms had been ripped from your body, how tears you’ve shed from the overstimulation. You’ve lost all sense of anything else but the hum between your legs and the torturous pleasure it brings.

Finally – finally – after yet another orgasm has crashed into you, the vibrations stop and you can’t help the absolute half-sob, half-sigh of relief that huffs from your chest. That sub-space that you had been fighting off, you now give into with a sigh, allowing the haze to sink into your body. It encompasses you, making you feel as if you were floating in the vastness of space, as if you were being smothered in velvet. The only thing that keeps you somewhat tied to earth is Matt’s gentle voice, the quiet praise falling from his lips. It takes Matt lifting you off the mattress and cradling you in his arms for you to fully come back to the present moment. Only then do you realize all the fabric that was previously tied along your body was gone, leaving you naked. You don’t care, choosing instead to nuzzle deeper into Matt’s chest as he whisks you away, your eyelids fluttering open and readjusting to the low candlelight of the bathroom.

Matt gently places you down into the tub already filled with warm water, the temperature feeling heavenly as it penetrates your muscles. A soft kiss on your temple is what Matt leaves you with before he exits the room, closing the door firmly behind him. You swear you hear hushed voices emanating from underneath the door but you are still too dazed to even bother worrying yourself over it. Eventually, Matt returns, this time with a small cart carrying a bottle of champagne and a plate of chocolate covered strawberries.

“Drink this first,” he quietly demands, handing you an ice-cold water bottle. “All of it.”

He doesn’t have to tell you twice, the chilled liquid never feeling more refreshing against your tongue, coating your sore throat. You give the empty bottle back to him, the plastic being replaced by smooth glass as he hands you a champagne flute, before leaning against the side of the tub with his own glass. You take in his appearance, hair still damp from his shower, only a pair of sweatpants on his frame. His own blue eyes appraise you similarly, the quiet concern mixing with a pure devotion in his irises. You finally decide to break the silence, your voice sounding terribly hoarse as you whisper.

“’M hungry.”

Matt just smiles before grabbing the plate of strawberries, setting them down on the small stool next to the bathtub, making it easy for you to reach them. You happily munch on the fruit, feeling a modicum of energy return to you as you lean back and let Matt take care of you. His hands move beneath the water, massaging your tight muscles before grabbing the soft cotton washcloth, dampening the material in order to wipe away the sweat still clinging to your skin. You only protest once with a small hiss when he brushes against your oversensitive core, the sound quieted with a hush. The praise that fell from his mouth might have just been repeated from earlier but this time you could register it and every word made your body warm.

Sounded so pretty for me. I knew you could handle it, my perfect girl. You did so well.

He eventually lets the bath drain, helping you out of the porcelain tub and drying off the water from your body. The plush complimentary robe is thrown over your frame and Matt takes your arm, gently guiding you back to the bedroom. You can’t stop the breathy laugh that falls from your lips when you spy the shopping bags, designer labels on all of them, now piled up by one side of the bed – a bed that had been stripped and remade with fresh sheets.

“For you,” Matt whispers in your ear, pressing a kiss against your temple. You reply by turning your head towards him to press your lips onto his. It is gentler than any other kiss you shared tonight and you melt into his embrace. He helps you slip underneath the sheets, his broad body not far behind as he wraps his arms around you, pulling your back into his chest.

“I could make it so that you would never have to work again,” he whispers to you, reiterating the proposal that he postulated almost every time he saw you. You are about to retort, a sigh of his name falling from your lips before he silences your protest by continuing. “I know, you like to feel independent. And I admire that about you. I just like having you by my side.”

You rotate your body in the bed, turning to face him, the sharp angles of his face highlighted by the lights of the city that never sleeps.

“I like being by your side,” you whisper, your heart soaring at the sight of his smile.

“I don’t want you to give up your life – become some sort of trophy or anything. I respect you too much to ask you to do that. Just… promise me you’ll think about it.”

He doesn’t fully elaborate what it is: whether he meant allowing your dynamic to expand to every aspect of your life so you could do what you wanted without the pressure of making money or whether he meant becoming his completely, without any monetary value placed on the relationship you shared.

But, the silence of the hotel room, you come to realize that there is little difference between those two possibilities.

Matt wouldn’t just stop taking care of you if he wasn’t bound by a contract. He was more than that. What you shared was more than that; more than a number in your bank account, more than the amount of designer product in your closet, more than a simple transaction.

It was something real.

[kcch-ns]

OOPS! WRONG PHOTO - denki kaminari

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 - denki kaminari x afab!reader

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 - aged up!!!!! pls no pedos yall😭, lowk cliffhanger, ALSO please bear with me this is SO short

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 - what happens when you accidentally send your classmate nudes and he sends them back?

𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 - i’ve never written a ff before so don’t judge me if this is bad😭 all inspiration goes to @sup-hoes-its-me

you groan again as you erase all the work you just did again. god, who knew being a hero meant you had to learn math. you glance between your phone and worksheet, contemplating if anyone would be willing to help you this late at night.

after a few minutes of just sitting there, looking at that device that displayed 2:29 am, you picked it up. opening your messages app and looking through people who could be awake right now.

kirishima? hmm, he’s probably not awake, he’s been training all day with bakugo. you thought to yourself.

deku? he could be awake but apparently he has a long day with all might tomorrow so i should just let him rest.

kaminari! he’s not doing anything i know of tomorrow and he’s pretty smart.

i clicked on his contact and sent him a quick text, hopefully he’s awake.

—

texts below

i stared at the text with wide eyes. holy shit holy shit holy shit. i shook my hands off before texting back a quick ‘yes yes yes😇’.

i stood up and walked over to my bed falling face first onto it. are we studying or is he coming here for more? mayb-

my thought got cut off as i heard a knock on my door. i groaned slightly before i got up and opened the door just to peek my head through.

‘hi’ i said meekly, avoiding looking into his eyes. i could see him smirking through my peripheral vision.

‘hey there!’ he says, inviting himself in and dropping his backpack on my bed. ‘so which homework question did you really need help with?’ he says as he glances as my desk that had papers scattered over it.

‘uhh.. well i was a bit confused on question 4’ i said, walking over to my desk and sitting down, him following behind me and leaning his head over my shoulder.

‘oh this one’s easy peasy, so basically…-‘ he trailed on about some random math stuff as i just sat there completely zoned out.

i mean, could you blame me? the guy i just accidentally sent a tit pic to is right next to me helping me with math homework.

‘…you got that, right?’ he said, turning his head to look at me. i looked to my right and my eyes widened. when did we get this close to eachother??

‘uhh yeah totally’ i lied. hopefully ill figure it out myself soon enough because i honestly did not listen to a thing he said.

he smirked as he noticed my flushed face. ‘so do i get my reward now?’ he said to me, tilting his head a bit.

‘reward? for what’ i said feigning confusion.

‘come onnn, angel. i’d think i deserve something in return for helping you.’ he said, moving even more closer to my face then before.

ummm..what the hell am i supposed to do. should i kiss him? yeah yeah totally. wait no ive never kissed someone before ill mess it up. ugh whatever yolo.

i looked down at his lips, hopefully they’re not chapped, then it’d be really awkward. i leaned in slowly and placed my lips onto his, feeling the slight peach fuzz on his upper lip.

i felt his hand on the side of my face as his thumb rubbed my cheek bone. i pulled away due to the lack of air i got before and during the kiss.

‘i’ve never really done..anything.. before..’ i said, looking down.

‘what, you need me to teach you that as-well?’ he said, squeezing my cheeks together and forcing my head up to look at him.

i nodded slowly while looking directly into his eyes. nervous for what’s to come as i see a devilish grin make its way onto his face.

a/n: guysss please drop some constructive criticism, i understand my writing is definitely..something! so i appreciate all the help i can get! also i apologize for how SHORT this is, it’s 3 am and my brain is not working properly

[octuscle]

I am the only smart and social guy in my class and I’m also he only gay one, normally I prefer to hang with the girls and do all my projects with them…but this time our teacher forced all us guys together, in time for the group project I overheard the boys talking about making me a real Man/boy with there phones. Help!

You have your first project meeting. You are sitting in a circle with the boys. Everyone is playing with their cell phones, picking their noses or scratching their balls. You take a deep breath. And you think you have an idea for an environmental project. Collecting trash on the bank of the creek behind the school. And classifying the garbage according to the possibility of recycling.

Dude, that's a lame idea, grunts one of the guys. We were thinking something like "how far can hard training get you in a week". The other guys applaud. And one presses the "Activate" button on the Chronivac app.

Hehehe, you're not into sports at all. But that sounds like a cool project. Shit, why didn't you come up with that idea. You do a little research on the Internet. Calculate the budget, write to a few sponsors. Look for sportswear, nutritional supplements, also look for sources of potentially illegal support. The other guys play with their cell phones. One of them says you should chill out. It's enough if you start tomorrow.

Project diary, day 1:

Erkan sent me a message this morning that he and the other guys will be at the gym at 08:00. I should come already dressed. I don't even remember that I already got a bag with gym clothes yesterday. But in any case, there is one next to my desk. I put on a tank top, some shorts, socks and shoes. While brushing my teeth in the bathroom, I think to myself how ridiculous the way-too-big clothes look on me. On the bus, I'm a little uncomfortable with my appearance. And between the boys in the gym even more so. But it's a project, we have to go through with it.

We spend six hours in the gym. Has been amazingly fun. Somehow I was the only one sweating. The boys just played with their cell phones again. Hopefully there are good pictures for the project documentation. After the training I wanted to take a shower, but the guys took me directly to their regular shisha bar. I have rarely felt so uncomfortable. Because everyone else is bigger, more muscular and more masculine than me. And because I'm the only guest in sweaty sports gear. Besides, I'm starting to feel the soreness. I just fall into bed in the evening. Unable to move.

Project diary, day 2:

At 06:00 I get an address from Bogdan. Barbershop from his cousin. Meeting at 07:00 so that I no longer have to train with the ridiculous blond curls. I'm supposed to put on yesterday's clothes. I didn't have the clothes hung up yesterday. Actually I wanted to put on fresh clothes today So, of course, nothing has dried. Brushing teeth must go quickly, I'm late. Fuck, I actually finally get beard growth? Must take a closer look at me later in the gym.

So far it does not get at all. Bogdan's cousin not only gives me a new haircut, he also shaves me. In my opinion, completely unnecessary. But the result is cool. For the first time I can imagine in the gym on the weight bench in front of the mirror that the project will be a success. Otherwise, the workout goes like yesterday. After the six-hour program, I was looking forward to a shisha. But Ivo takes me to the outdoor pool. One hour of swimming One hour on the lawn. One hour of swimming. Ivo allows me to take a cold shower without shower gel after swimming. It feels good. And I like my tight white ass.

Project diary, day 3:

When Akay sends me the message to remember that my gym clothes are still in the locker, I'm already awake for an hour. Pushups and situps. I got quite a tantrum from my mom yesterday about how my room looks. Hey, the laundry isn't that dirty yet. And I'll clean up the cum-soaked handkerchiefs tonight.

Since the rest is as I said in the gym, I go only in tracksuit with white socks and Adiletten in the bus. I look so antisocial. Makes me somehow horny. In the gym I'm alone today. Fuck, to be honest, the losers only disturb. Let them hang out, I have my own rhythm. And it beats out of iron. For solid muscles. I take a break only to pour protein shakes into me. And on the way to the outdoor pool I make a quick stop at Bogdan's cousin. Trimming the sides And trim the beard.

At dinner, my mother tells me that I stink as much as my room. My father is on my team. He pumps himself. And considerably more than me. It's good to have support at home for my goals. I eat my five chicken breasts with rice, drink two more liters of water and then go to bed. Dad looks in again, laughs, says that nothing stinks as cool as pump sweat and asks if he should get me a syringe cure. Fist bump, old man! But I stay natural for now.

Project diary, day 4:

Was horny while pumping. Today on the bench 150 kilograms pressed. Need new tank top. The old one stinks excellent. But is too tight.

In the evening once again met with the guys on Shisha. Was cool. But they are not focused enough. Juri has scratched his belly. Ey, hardly a six-pack to see. Would I be ashamed of myself!

Project diary, day 6:

Ey, yesterday completely forgotten the diary. Was in great shape in the gym. In the afternoon then posed at the pool. Trained on the pull-up bars. The fans applauded. And in the evening with my old man bombed our arms for an hour. I'd like to have his biceps too.

Today is free. Sascha got me an appointment with the tattoo artist. Before again Barber And afterwards outdoor pool. And then party. The boys and me to the disco. Man, I could have had them all! And I fucked two guys on the toilet. Shit, I have so much energy, I really have to cum four times a day. At least!

Project diary, day 7:

I can only hope that one of the guys makes the presentation about our project. I'm so totally not up for it. I already wrote the damn diary. And I was the guinea pig. I'm a fucking hot lab rat.

One of the guys said last night that I used to be a nerd and a weakling. Must have been a long time ago.

[charcoalgrayswriting]

hi, I don’t know if it’s a bad time to ask(ignore this if it’s) but what are some of the fics idea you currently have? I love to hear about them(and get my mind off today)

Hi! Thank you for this ask :) this one has been bouncing around in my head for a while now

After Solovetsky, Adler decides not to kill Bell. Instead, she is sent to Berlin as an American CIA Agent working with BND. From there, she is given a new name, Maria Donovan.

She works diligently in analysis and decryption, rather than field work. Then, two years later, news reaches the BND that the CIA was in town. While slightly peeved that she hadn’t been contacted, she was hoping that they would just avoid her. But then, much to her displeasure, she is requested to work on a mission with them, and one of the newer agents.

When she comes face to face with Adler after a little over a year of no contact, she is understandably stony towards him. The poor newbie the BND sent with her is so confused. Adler tries to poke her, joking and such, but she shuts him down.

They complete their mission and she goes back to BND after having a private heated discussion with Adler. The next day her boss informs her that she will be helping the CIA out for the duration of their stay. Needless to say, she is pissed. He sends her off with another beer.

Working mostly on decryption and analysis with minimal field work, she is professionally cold with the team, turning down attempts at team bonding. This lasts until she starts decoding messages from Perseus directly to her, the analyst. He doesn’t seem to realize who she is, who she was.

She finds and tells Adler just as she has a panic attack, thinking he would think she was trying to go back to Perseus while also panicking because she doesn’t want to go to Perseus.

He attempts to talk her out of it, but ends up making it worse. Because of course he does. All of the emotions she has been suppressing since he came back bubble out, and he just bundles her into a tight hug, and her legs give out. He sinks down onto the floor with her, and it ends with her sobbing in his lap.

He holds her and strokes her hair, before carrying her to his room to calm her down once she is no longer crying, but sniffling. She is still unresponsive to him. There he just holds her in his lap and rocks her until she falls asleep in his arms before tucking her under the covers. He falls asleep next to her on top of the covers, wrapped around her, protecting her.

Woods snuck in and took a picture without being caught. It was promptly printed, and will be used later as blackmail.

The little meme that inspired this whole thing:

Bell to the newbie after the boss tells her Adler asked for her: You’re driving.

Newbie: Why?

Bell: Because I’m not gonna be able to get through this unless I start day drinking right now.

*the boss solemnly pulls a bigass bottle of beer or something from his desk and hands it to her*

Newbie: Wha—

*Bell pops the top and takes a big swig* Thanks

Boss: That man calls every month to check in on you. He’s a pain in my ass. Good luck.

Bell: You should be wishing him luck.

*Confused Newbie noises*

Bell: Don’t worry about it kid.

Bell, internally: Oh no now I sound like him

[miminmimikyu]

Prodigy episodes 15-16: If at first you do not succeed (your first officer says "no, we should be sensible" re: your plan steal a ship AGAIN), try again (just immediately ask your former first officer, hoping for a different answer). King Janeway <3

Tell me this (top) doesn't remind you of this (bottom)

“I’m not your number one anymore…” “things can’t stay the same forever” god why are those two like this.

Iiiiiiinteresting that they’re discussing Endgame here. And I can't believe Janeway’s clothes are a bootstrap paradox now

I 100% wonder what the gang is assuming about Janeway and Chakotay’s relationship!! Is their takeaway message “ah. married?” or “huh. i suppose captain-first officer dynamics are like that”

Kinda obsessed with how often Janeway and Chakotay being loving towards each other is paired with Dal and Gwyn, either in the same frame or in a shot directly preceding/after it.

Ahh I’m reminded again about how Chakotay’s a former terrorist but was probably the most rule-abiding person on Voyager. There’s probably a higher chance of Tuvok agreeing to a plan involving ship stealing than Chakotay.

Ascencia has the worst (best) timing. Doesn’t realise that by attacking she’s given Janeway an ironclad legally bulletproof reason to ignore Starfleet orders and to continue with the mission (HER mission). Don’t get in the way of a Janeway who’s just been told they’re going to split up her crew. Ascencia may think she has a near-omniscient time traveler as a trump card but he didn’t tell her to wait x days until Janeway was locked up in her office before declaring war with the Federation!

Just the idea of Janeway sitting behind a desk is making me itch.

Obviously Ascencia couldn’t know about Jellico’s orders, but she really hasn’t studied Janeway enough (both during the time she infiltrated the crew of the Dauntless + any reading she did while in Starfleet). It’s interesting that just by the coincidence that Janeway was the highest in command on the ship Ascencia infiltrated, Janeway morphs into a representation of all of Starfleet in Ascencia's eyes and thus has turned almost Ascencia's entire focus of revenge towards Janeway. Notably, the other revenge target is Gwyn (Ilthuran's betrayal) and though that's definitely 95% personal/5% mission, she acts no different with Janeway. She's taking pleasure in seeing Janeway suffer, so similar to how she takes personal joy in Gwyn's suffering. Even more interesting is that Chakotay, the guy who foiled the future!Vau Na'kat plans with the Protostar, was right there in view when she videocalled Janeway. She must know of him, but she didn’t react to him at al-- just to Janeway & Gwyn (Or maybe that confrontation is for a later episode).

I’m loving Dal gaining some respect from the other Nova cadets. NOT loving that they’ve been sent off to battle

So many Tom Paris mentions (yay) but what i really want is a Harry mention....... please

Right, that's what I forgot about in episode 13: Jankom helping Zero through their body deteriorating is everything to me………"I just want to feel like... me." aaaaaaaaaaa

Dal has grown so much! I can’t believe he’s the one to put the gang at ease and reassure them that the Federation might better equipped to fix everything. No doubt that all the competent, trustworthy adults Dal has met since boarding the Protostar have had their hand in this change. Again, I really love that the Prodigy writers chose to have the S2 adults treat the children with respect, so we get moments like these.

God that space battle was so exciting! After so many Voyager-A crewmembers were killed by the Loom, it was so nerve-wracking seeing them sit there dead in the water! I for sure thought Tysess was a goner!

Zerooooooooooooo!! A harrowing experience and sacrifice worthy of any of the "adult" Star Trek shows!!! π_π Zero’s new suit is so nice! It's even crafted "from" the Protostar by Jankom, couldn't be nicer! Also I really like how this episode resolved the whole corporeal-noncorporeal binary with Zero settling on not one or the other, but something new and unique in between. Good for them!

(Too bad they can’t eat anymore, but if original Voyager’s crew is anything to go by, Tuvix’s food was the best anyone has ever eaten so after experiencing that, there’s nothing to beat that I suppose)

Maj'el is pretty bold doing that in front of everyone! Teenage "who cares" mentality or is that hypothesis about "unhinged" Vulcans ending up in Starfleet true?

[sailorshadzter]

Prompt for story: Before the Long Night, Sansa and Gilly talk about supplies (and the lack of it) while Little Sam plays in the background. Gilly notices Sansa's quiet sadness while she was gazing at Little Sam, they talk about Little Sam and Sansa's dream for children (and how it could never be for her). Gilly picks Sam up and asks Sansa if she wants to hold him.

Sam and Jon come back to the solar and sees how happy Sansa is while holding Little Sam on her arms. Jon moves toward her and unconsciously holds her waist while caressing Little Sam's ankles. Gilly and Sam look at them in understanding.

Make me cry with this prompt, thank you!!!

oh i LOVED this prompt.

sorry i did change it just a tiny bit. once i started writing it just kind of came naturally, so i didnt realize id messed up what you really asked. i hope you enjoy it anyways!!!

send me prompts

When the knocks sounds on her door, she looks up from behind her desk, calling for them to enter as she sets aside the scroll she’s been reading. To her surprise, it is not Lord Royce nor any other Northern lord come to call, but rather it is the woman she knows to be called Gilly. In her arms she carries her young son, Sam was his name, apologetically smiling when the boy lets out a cheerful cry at the sight of the new face. “My lady,” she greets, setting her son at her feet as she comes to stand before the desk. “Lord Royce sent me to deliver a message to you.”

Truth was, Gilly has been trying to find any way to be helpful during this time- she cannot do much of anything beyond cooking or mending, but she was determined to help in any way she could. Even if that left her to be a messenger. “And the message?” Sansa asks, pushing back from her desk so she might stand upright. Blue eyes cannot help but to flicker to the baby on the floor, now on his hands and knees, perhaps thinking he might crawl further into the room he’s never been in before. 

“He says there’s just enough grain to last another few weeks, with the new arrivals.” Gilly repeats the words the old man had spoken to her just a few minutes before. She watches as something like darkness crosses over the Stark woman’s face, her beauty icy cold as she comes to stand on the other side of the desk, closer to her. “He also said for you not to worry,” she continues and Sansa lets out a soft laugh, shaking her head as she shifts her gaze from Gilly back to the baby who has now crawled halfway across the room. She also notices there is almost something like sadness there in those blue eyes, perhaps even regret. “I’m sorry, my lady, let me…” But Sansa is shaking her head, surprising Gilly when she crosses the room to reach down and lift the baby into her arms, cooing at him as only a mother might do. Gilly is even more surprised to see her son’s reaction- almost at once the baby is babbling, smiling, giggling back at the icy cold Lady of Winterfell. But, now that Gilly watches, she can see that cold exterior melting away. 

“Lord Royce means well, but I cannot help but to worry,” Sansa murmurs aloud as she turns back to face Gilly, who glances down at the floor, not used to being looked at so directly by someone so far above her station. “My people are the ones who will suffer from this,” she’s thinking of the commonfolk, the ones not even yet come to Winterfell, the ones who would likely be dead when all of this was over. Chills race the length of her spine and for a long moment she closes her eyes. When she opens them again, she finds the child’s mother to be looking back at her, soft brown eyes uncertain in their gaze. “Your son is quite sweet,” she says, steering the conversation elsewhere, one hand reaching up so she might touch the downy soft hair upon his little head. 

“He is taken with you, my lady,” Gilly speaks truthfully, for the child was still yet staring up at her with a gummy grin. “You look as if you are meant to do this,” for a moment, there comes that quiet sadness once more, darkening her blue eyes as she smiles down at the baby, one little hand wrapped tightly around her finger. “I’m sorry, my lady, I only meant…” 

“No, it’s alright,” Sansa replies with a smile for the mother instead. “I did once long to be a mother,” she admits, speaking freely in front of this woman as she’s never spoken to anyone before. “I loved having little brothers and a sister to look after,” she will never forget the warm weight of Rickon in her arms when he was but a baby no bigger than little Sam. And to think he now rotted in the ground in the crypts. “He is a sweet boy, you are lucky to have him.” She smiles for Gilly this time, a smile which brightens those blue eyes that stare back at her.

For a few minutes they make small talk, but Sansa cannot bring herself to give the baby up. His weight is warm and soft in her arms, reminding her of days long gone, reminding her of a life she probably would never get back. It is a soft pain, a dull ache, something she knows she will live with until the end of her days. 

When the door opens quite unceremoniously, Gilly turns with surprise, eyes wide at the thought of someone barging in like this upon the Lady of Winterfell. But then she sees who it is, it is Jon Snow with her own Sam close at his heels, looking uncomfortable about entering a room without so much as a knock. 

Jon can’t take his eyes off of the sight of her there, baby in her arms. It is a fitting look, one which even he can recall from their childhood days, when Rickon had been more like her baby than her mother’s. And then he’d grown up just enough that he would cling to her skirts in the courtyard as Robb and he wrestled in the mud. He feels the familiar sense of longing, the pang of anguish that those days were long gone, never to come  back again. “He likes you,” Jon observes as he falls into place beside her, his arm reaching around her waist all so he might feel the warmth of her against him. “Little Sam, are you going to be her new friend?” He asks the baby as he caresses the baby’s soft skin, exposed where his gown was riding up around his ankles. The baby smiles and giggles in response, rocking excitedly in Sansa’s arms.

From where she watches, Gilly can’t help but to visualize them as a happy family, a baby with Stark features wrapped in the lady’s arms. “Bring him again to visit me, won’t you?” Sansa asks as she reluctantly passes the baby back to his mother. Gilly happily nods, shifting the baby carefully as she turns to go, Sam at her side. “Bye bye, little Sam,” she calls out when they reach the door, just before the door swings closed.

And when Gilly turns back to look, she swears she sees Sansa falling into Jon’s arms.

[saiilorstars]

Ch. 28: The Last Hurrah

[Story Masterlist] // [Aitana’s Masterlist]

Fandom: Criminal Minds // Pairing: Spencer Reid x OFC

Taglist: @ocappreciationtag​​​​​ @arrthurpendragon​​​​​ @anotherunreadblog​​​​​ @maaaaarveeeeel​​​​​ @stareyedplanet​​​​​ @averyhotchner​​​​​​ @foxesandmagic @kmc1989​​​​​​

If you’d like to be a part of Aitana’s taglist, please let me know!

Also available on Fanfic ○ Ao3 ○ Wattpad

It was both curious and blatantly concerning for the team to be gathered around the conference table at such an early time. Penelope was the last to arrive and, unsurprisingly, was the most anxious of the group.

"I didn't get a file sent to me," she said first instead of her usual morning greeting. "Aitana didn't call me either, I...did a case go directly to Hotch?"

"Don't know," Rossi said, "But he's in his office with Serrano right now."

"What!?" Penelope practically shrieked, startling the entire group.

"Probably just talking," Seaver said for her comfort. "A case, you know?"

Penelope couldn't see it as clearly as Seaver. "No, no, a meeting this early? When's the last time this happened?"

Not surprising either, it was Spencer who answered. "Three years, 8 months ago."

The others exchanged glances with similar confusion.

"And what happened?" Seaver was the brave one to ask.

"Gideon left." Spencer knew the weight of his words for the others. It was his first thought when he got Hotch's message and it did not fade when he saw Aitana in Hotch's office either. They both seemed very grim and the last time something like that happened, somebody left the team.

Aitana hadn't given anyone a clue about what she had decided in relation to her position at the BAU but they all knew that she finally had her evaluation with Hotch a couple days ago. Who's to say that this meeting wasn't to announce her departure from the team?

~ 0 ~

"You understand that I don't support this decision?" Hotch looked directly at Aitana across his desk. He had tried coming up with a kinder way to say what had been decided over his head but it didn't matter what he said, Aitana understood.

"I get it," she assured him twice before Hotch felt some kind of guilt-release. "I mean...this has already happened before, right?" Hotch nodded silently. "They did it to JJ and she was way more qualified than I was. What did I really expect?"

"If I can help to change the decision, I'll try. They don't fool me," Hotch shook his head. "This is a sugar-coated ultimatum. Either you go work for them or—"

"I have some higher-up breathing down my shoulder for staying with a half job posting I'm not qualified to do," Aitana nodded. "Yeah, I got that too."

"Like I said, I'll do my best to—"

"Please don't," Aitana cut Hotch off. "The last thing I want is for anyone to get into trouble because of me." She also knew that his intervention wouldn't really be much help. His efforts to get JJ back to the BAU had not exactly gone so well and even though he was still technically trying, the efforts had begun to wane.

Aitana saw no point in continuing the conversation. Beside the fact that it was awkward as hell, she needed time to process. "Can I...go to my office for a moment?"

"Of course," Hotch motioned her towards the door. "I'll be talking to the team about the changes."

"Okay, I'll be there in a bit." Aitana rose from her chair and walked out of the office in a slow, almost monotonous, manner. She had a lot to process indeed.

~0~

Hotch walked into the conference room going straight to the point. The team had to be making up dozens of assumptions over their early meeting so it was better to just cut straight to it. "The Director called a meeting last night to discuss budgets."

"They skipped over Strauss?" Rossi asked, taken by surprise.

"She's away. The Bureau is facing a lot of changes and this unit is no exception. Over the next few weeks, each of you is going to be asked if you'd like to stay with the unit."

Penelope's eyebrows raised, her response coming out in a tumble. "Why wouldn't we?" She wanted to ask so badly why Hotch was even starting without Aitana present. If she thought of it, then the others had to have already asked themselves the same thing.

"There are other options for you out there," Hotch answered her plain and simple. "And while I want the unit to stay together, I understand completely if you want to see what the alternatives are."

"Have some of us already decided to leave?" Seaver asked and Penelope dared to think that she had done it to help her out. She almost mouthed a 'thank you' to Seaver.

"I'm not at liberty to discuss," Hotch cleverly said to avoid actually saying something conclusive.

Spencer, however, saw through the actual meaning. "So there is a change." Hotch met his gaze for only a second but it was enough to double confirm Spencer's assumption. It took very little to figure out where that change was happening.

"Morgan, there's renewed interest in you from the New York office," Hotch said, but Morgan almost scoffed.

"Nobody's called me."

"They will."

Morgan's expression turned incredulous fast. "That doesn't mean I'm gonna go."

Still peacefully calm, Hotch agreed. "Oh, I know."

"Are you staying here?"

"It's my intention," Hotch said, almost promising. "All I ask is if you are contacted by another division that you let me know."

There was a pause when Aitana stepped into the room. She could feel burning eyes with questions being thrown her way so she focused entirely on Hotch. "I just got a call. Virginia State police believe they've uncovered a serial killer. They need us at Zacha Road and Route 7 as soon as possible."

Hotch thanked her for the notice. "Morgan, you and Dave get out there."

"What about this?" Penelope quickly asked when the pair of agents started getting up to leave. This conversation wasn't even remotely close to being finished.

"We can talk about it later," Hotch said, getting up as well.

"I'm going to make a few calls," Aitana announced as she was already turning to walk out. Clear avoidance tactic,

Penelope was left to cross gazes with Spencer and Seaver because Hotch had gotten out of there quickly as well. She was helpless and possibly frightened. "What's happening?"

Neither agent had an answer for her.

~0~

Paige Hawley

Jake.

The case would turn out to go deeper than it being a lone serial killer. Aitana knew that the moment she spotted a familiar face walking into the bullpen. She had secluded herself in her office while she worked through the pending paperwork on her desk. There wasn't much the team could do until Rossi and Morgan examined the crime scene. Aitana expected Penelope to pop into the office soon enough and she had yet to come up with a good explanation for the questions Penelope would no doubt ask her.

When Penelope eventually did peek her head inside the office, it wasn't to ask her questions. "Hotch wants us in the conference room."

A life saver, thought Aitana. It would buy her a bit more time. "Okay, let's go." She got up from her seat, dumping a folder over her paperwork.

"Well hey," Penelope grabbed hold of Aitana's arm. "Is there something you need to tell us?"

Poor thing was full of concern that it made Aitana feel terrible. It's not your fault, she had to remind herself.

Aitana put on a small smile for her friend. "Nothing yet." She gingerly removed Penelope's hand from her arm and led the way out of the office.

Yet. Penelope held onto the word tightly. It was a warning that something was already coming.

SSA Andi Swan,the head of the Domestic Trafficking Task Force, was waiting for the BAU to gather in the conference room. She'd been notified of the corpses the team had found and as such, she was certain that it was one of her guys responsible.

"Do you know who did this?" Seaver asked her. Even a small guess could help them move faster.

Unfortunately, Andi shook her head. "I've been 2 steps behind an organization that abducts college kids throughout the U. S."

"How long have you been tracking them?"

"Three years." The weariness in Andi's tone was palpable. "But this is the first time there's been an identifiable body."

"So you think this is their work?" asked Spencer.

"It's definitely their type. Stressed-out, vulnerable kids. They're all from good families, making them low-risk for abduction. Young innocents are worth more money. And they're harder to lure, so they hold on to them for a longer period of time."

All the information was more repulsive to hear rather than when she would just read about it. Aitana couldn't remember ever doing a job so close to human trafficking. "How many victims are they holding at once?"

"That's hard to say. But from what I can tell, there's a lot of turnover. Customers don't want to see the same faces twice. We don't think they travel with more than a handful of victims at one time. They hunt all over the country. All they need is a car. They might be low-tech, but they're organized. And profitable. The rumor is that they hold events for 2 days in metropolitan areas and then they disappear."

Penelope dreaded to ask knowing what the answer would probably be, but her curiosity got the best of her. "What kind of events?"

"Where top-paying customers can do things like this—" Andi made a gesture to their evidence boards holding the photographs of their two victims, "—and worse to the victims. It seems impossible to trace. We study their behavior. They're not a good breed, but they're still human. They make a few mistakes. We've also recently established an undercover unit."

"Wait, how can you infiltrate them?" Seaver paused to think. "Wouldn't your agents have to commit a crime to be accepted as a customer?"

Andi nodded. "Exactly. That's why we can't pose as buyers. The entire system is set up to protect the customers, but there's no way we can trace them from that end."

"Your agents go in as targets," said Hotch. "Do you have anybody under now?"

"Locally a few. They're still establishing the backstories. They might be able to help. I'll call." Andi excused herself to go do that. In a matter of minutes she would come to find out that one of her U.C.s had disappeared, prompting an emergency check in from her and Hotch.

The remaining agents were to go through the missing people cases until Morgan and Rossi returned from the morgue.

Penelope came into the room with a fresh new load of files in her arms. "Here are the missing coeds since 2009." She let them drop unceremoniously on the table beside Seaver's spot, making her flinch.

"Wow…" Her eyes widened at the big pile. She looked over to Spencer for some help.

"Yeah, uh, we still need to narrow this down…" He moved over to grab the first file and give it a quick skim. "Let's look at last-known locations. Maybe there's an overlap."

"They're from all over the place," Penelope informed rather tersely.

Seaver grabbed the next file to give a skim as well. "These guys hunt in target-rich environments. Clubs, malls, that kind of thing."

"What are Morgan and Rossi finding?" Spencer asked Penelope. He noticed her staring a bit too hard at the table. He could only wonder how many things were running through her mind at the moment.

"Uh…" She had to rack her brain to remember what Morgan had told her earlier. "A lot of mud on the car and the victims."

"Mud? Did it rain here?"

"No, not here. South. Morgan has a theory that based on the gas mileage, they must have filled up within 70 miles of the accident."

"Gotcha. How many gas stations you find?"

"42."

"How'd you narrow that down?"

Penelope frowned. "I didn't."

Spencer paused to give her a look. Now that was concerning. "Why not?"

"I didn't have any more parameters."

Even more concerning.

Seaver thought the same thing. "That never stopped you before."

Penelope seemed to get the gist of their hints and straightened herself up. "I'll be right back..." She bumped into Aitana at the doorway and while Aitana tried to greet her, Penelope moved right around her and kept going.

Aitana blinked and looked after her for a second. "She's upset with me, isn't she?" She sighed. She should have seen that coming.

"Don't take it personal," Spencer said, "She really doesn't like change."

Aitana turned around and shot him a smile. "Running theme amongst you guys, huh?"

Spencer dove his attention back to the file in his hands. Yes, yes it was.

"Is there something we should know about?" Seaver cautiously asked Aitana. She had seen practically everyone bite their lip to keep themselves from asking the scary question. She couldn't do it.

With a sigh, Aitana nodded. "You guys are going to figure it out anyways. I just don't really know how to tell Penelope. Or...everyone actually."

"You're leaving," Spencer said, trying to be as casual as he could about it. Like stated, he did not like change either.

Aitana sighed again, deeper. "It looks that way, yeah."

"It looks?" Seaver repeated, her expression twisting with confusion. "What do you mean?"

Even Spencer looked up from his file, actually lowering it to study Aitana. She seemed more upset than anyone else and that wasn't the behavior of someone who wanted to transfer. He felt a twinge of something in his heart. "What's happening?"

Aitana teeth dug deep into her bottom lip. "They want to move me," she said. It was difficult talking about it knowing it was already in the works. "It's like Hotch said, the directors are looking to make cuts in units. They're looking at everyone's records including mine. They saw my history and they think I would be better suited in the Human Resources department." She was sure that she had the same stare of shock as Spencer and Seaver on her face when Hotch told her the news earlier in the morning. "I'm one of the few FBI agents who managed to come back from WPP and, apparently, successfully reintegrate enough to continue working in the same field." A success story is what she was reduced to.

"What? So they...they just want to move you like that?" Seaver asked. That was all well reasoned by the directors but what would be the point?

Aitana nodded. "They want me to work with the FBI academy. The new agents coming in should have someone with firsthand experience of the hardships of the job." Essentially, they wanted her to weed out the agents who wouldn't be cut out for the FBI. "I'm meeting with the head tomorrow."

"They're not giving you a choice," Spencer said, speaking from the unfortunate experience at the beginning of the year. They had done the same to JJ and now they were going after Aitana too.

"Technically they are," Aitana swallowed hard. This is the part she feared would gain her the disdain of the team, especially Penelope based on how she was already acting.

Spencer was curious. "What do you mean?"

"The BAU needs more profilers and since I technically have seniority than you," she made a quick point to Seaver, "They were willing to consider my switch of positions within the BAU as a full time profiler. Hotch had already asked me if I wanted the job but I wasn't sure back then. I am now. I don't know what possessed JJ to ask me to take over her job but now I'm glad that she did because I love it. What used to be hard for me is now one of the things I like to do. I like being closer to the families and you know what?" A laugh slipped out of her. "I love putting reporters in their places."

At that, both Spencer and Seaver would agree with her. She didn't earn her nickname for nothing.

"But if I became a full-time profiler, I would lose that connection. I can't be that close to a job I want while I work with something else. It would just be too much." She thought about it over she's over since the morning. Hotch told her she could still agree to be a profiler but the more thought, the less she wanted to do it. She was finally back to a point in her life where she was confident that she knew how to do her job and that she wanted to do it. She didn't have to work a job that was handed to her with a cautious hand because she might snap from her WPP days. She was more healed now than she had been at the beginning of the year.

"At least in the human resources department, I can talk to people kind of how I do here." She had to console herself somehow and this was the nicest thing she could see in the midst of all the gray. "They want me to weed out the 'weak ones' but there are no weak people. I can give them the tools that I didn't have when I first started."

"That's a really nice way of thinking," Seaver said. "You would've definitely helped me out." Role models were desperately needed within the academy. She had Rossi but he was hardly there. Someone needed to be looking out for the new students and she knew Aitana had the caring gene packed down.

"Thanks," Aitana said. "I just feel terrible that I...I have to go."

"It's not your fault," Spencer said. "Penelope will see that. I see it."

"So you guys aren't mad that I chose to leave?" Aitana looked between the pair with anxious eyes. "They gave me the option…"

"You stood your ground, that's the most important part," Seaver offered her a friendly smile.

"Yeah, I'm just so sorry they're doing this again," Spencer added. He couldn't possibly guess how much his input relieved Aitana. Even though they'd worked through their problems, she feared that he might be like Penelope in the end.

"You sure?" She had to ask just to fully get rid of her doubt.

Spencer nodded. "Of course. You felt like you needed to do the right thing."

"Yeah," Aitana exhaled. She leaned her hands on the top of a chair, gripping it so tight her knuckles were turning white. "I just hope it turns out okay." It was all she could do at this point.

~ 0 ~

"Using the club Renée went to as a template, there are potentially 63 others who were taken by the same offenders." Spencer was happy to give the files back to Penelope. It was tough to go through those files knowing they would only save a potential few of the missing people.

Seaver unknowingly shared the same sentiment. She handed back her share of files with a heavy sigh. "There's no way to know which ones are still alive."

Aitana quietly slid her share back as well. There were just no comments to coherently describe what she felt with this case. She could only hope they found a lot of victims still alive.

"Andi Swan," Morgan looked at the woman coming into the room with Hotch. "How you been?"

Andi could only bob her head. "Better. Thanks for helping out."

"Nice to see you again, Andi," Rossi shook hands with her next.

"What'd you find?" Hotch asked the pair.

"We tracked the driver to a gas station outside Culpepper," Morgan said. "He used a pay phone to call another one in the same town."

"So they're close. And careful."

Morgan nodded then glanced over to Andi. "What's their budget on location?"

"Not much. They pay cash, no questions asked. Security's top priority."

Aitana was sure that every time they asked Andi a question, things were worse than the previous answer. "So this guy's found a place to hold let's say a dozen victims? That means we're looking for a secluded spot in rural Virginia." A sour smile crossed her face. "That shouldn't be hard to find."

"I thought traffickers concentrated in port cities," said Rossi after a moment's thought over the rural locations.

"International ones do," Andi clarified. "Unfortunately, domestic traffickers abduct all over the country. It doesn't seem like they stay in one location long after an abduction. They move quickly and efficiently. My guess was in a nondescript car, and until this morning that was just a theory."

"Well they've lost their driver now, so they're in jeopardy," Penelope said, hoping that would spark some hope that they would be able to catch them on a mistake.

"They'll move out tonight," Andi said with all the certainty in the world.

Morgan was a bit more reluctant to fully believe it. "But they've got customers and victims lined up. They don't want to lose the money."

"And technically, their location hasn't been compromised yet," Aitana added, unknowingly following Penelope's hope path. "If they don't move tonight, we have a window of opportunity."

"She's right," Hotch said, eyes shifting to Andi. "You said Renee went to the local clubs, do you know which ones?"

Andi nodded. "She'd report back if anyone suspicious approached her. We followed the leads, nothing panned out."

"What was the last club?" Penelope asked, fingers wiggling over her keyboard.

"Scotty's in Georgetown." Andi held her breath while Penelope searched for the club. Too many things were running in her mind but the main one managed to slip through her lips. "If they find out she's an agent, she's dead."

"Penelope's incredibly fast at searching, she'll have something for us to narrow the search down," Aitana said, offering the blonde analyst a kind smile.

Penelope paused for a brief second to meet Aitana's gaze. Whatever frustration she held for Aitana dissipated with her kind words. It was almost frustrating how those big eyes of hers were just too sweet to be angry with.

"Let's discuss the leader," Hotch switched them while Penelope did her search. Their window of opportunity wouldn't last all night. "We need to look at this from the leader's point of view. A group like this requires a strong leader."

"Yeah, this guy's in charge of some unstable personalities," Morgan remarked. "Do you have any theories?"

Andi nodded. She had thousands of them but she narrowed them down to fit the situation. "I have always thought he led through fear. This guy can blackmail his whole team. Look at the progression of this network. They started abducting victims for sex and then adapted to killing."

"Because he saw the growth potential in his assets," Spencer said, a logical reason. "Instead of just disposing of them, he made it into a show."

"And that's why the victims are so young," Andi said. "The customers will pay top dollar to see them tortured."

"But the average guy doesn't have that kind of money laying around," Seaver said out of sheer common sense. Oftentimes, that was all they needed to get to the next point. "So they're successful. And incredibly deviant. That's their big secret. If it was revealed, they'd be ruined."

"But they still have criminally prove themselves to join the club," Aitana said, her expression scrunching with confusion. "How can they be upstanding citizens and still prove themselves to these people?"

There was a moment of silence while everyone considered the options.

"It could be a white-collar crime, like money laundering," Morgan thought first.

Hotch went with it and added: "That's often done through real estate. Garcia, who owned the clubs where the victims went missing?"

Penelope quickly opened a new tab to turn her search around. "Um, Bruce Harmon owns the club in Arizona."

"And in Ohio?"

"Bob Moore."

"And Scotty's in Georgetown?"

"Bob Moore is a partner in that."

There was the beginning of something.

"Do any of them own property in Virginia?" asked Hotch.

Penelope nodded fairly quickly. "Moore also is a partner in the development of a private facility."

"What happened to it?"

"It...looks like bad guys go through hardship, too," Penelope rolled her eyes. "Financiers pulled all the money out in 2009, so it's not anything."

Another something.

"What was it?" asked Rossi.

"It was supposed to be a tough-love rehab center, but now-" Penelope stopped when seh saw a photograph of the property, "Now it's just an abandoned factory in the middle of nowhere. With a lot of acreage and mud."

"How close to the gas station?" Morgan asked.

"Eight miles west of it."

They had the something.

"Let's go," Hotch ordered the group, though Andi was already on her way out.

"I'll gather the other divisions," Aitana said, feeling bittersweet once she realized this was the last time she would be doing any such thing for them. It actually hurt.

~ 0 ~

They were in stealth mode when they arrived at the building. There were no visible guards outside which just spoke volumes of the group's confidence in their solidarity. They divided themselves up into three different teams to take the various entry ways into the building.

Hotch would lead a handful of the S.W.A.T. team directly from the main entry of the building. Rossi and Morgan would lead through the back and Aitana and Seaver followed Andi through the maze of hallways from the side of the building. They had the true element of surprise in the situation and they would use it until they couldn't anymore.

Morgan would be the first to break the element of surprise but with Rossi's help, they were able to keep it under wraps. One by one, they all took down the guards without startling their predecessors.

Aitana came across a set of double-sliding doors. A big chain protected it so she stepped back and motioned one of the S.W.A.T. to break it down. As soon as they did, the others rushed inside. Cages lined either side of them and each one was filled with victims.

"Oh my God," Seaver was outright horrified. She froze in the middle of the aisle while the rest of the team swarmed past them to free the victims.

Aitana couldn't remember another moment that had caused Seaver such a deep emotion, and that was saying something considering everything they saw each day. "C'mon," she tugged the woman by the arm. "We got the victims, you can get the bastards paying for this crap."

Seaver nodded her head though her body seemed to shake. It was unnatural of her usual composure. She turned around and headed back in the direction they'd come in through.

Aitana would make a note to check up on her afterwards but right now her main priority were the victims. She was sure they would all need some type of medical attention. By the time she oversaw the victims' transfer from the building into either ambulances or cars, the others had gotten all the "customers" in handcuffs and packed into the backs of cars.

Hotch and Andi were together when Aitana stopped by. They had just witnessed Renee Matlin being taken in an ambulance. She was beaten but she would make it.

"Please tell me we got everyone?" she asked the pair.

As if to answer her question, Seaver walked by with one last handcuffed man. "This is the last one," she told them.

"How many arrests?" asked Hotch.

"Eighteen."

"And 7 victims rescued," Aitana added, meeting Seaver's gaze. It was a win tonight.

They heard loud screech of tires and in the next moment, a car burst from the building.

"Hey, stop that vehicle!" Hotch yelled hte order, prompting a series of gunfire to take shots at the fleeing car.

They managed to stop the car not too far from them. A swarm of them ran to arrest whoever was behind the wheel. However, they found the driver dead from one of their bullets and one more girl in the backseat.

Rossi helped her out of the car. She was in tears and seemed rattled by everything.

"She needs medical attention," Rossi called, already making way for them with the girl.

Seaver made a hurry to inspect the rest of the car for any other victims the unsub might have taken with him. Aitana came around the back to see Seaver opening the trunk. There was no one. No one else was in the car.

"Hey Hotch?" Aitana called, leading Hotch and Andi to come over. "I may be off here but...that guy behind the wheel...he only took one girl?"

That was beyond weird. These people didn't typically care for victims if they crossed into being a hassle.

"Seven victims," Seaver said, eyebrows knitting together. "Left in the cages while the customers made a run for it."

"No, no, these guys don't…" Andi shook her head, "They just move on, they don't…"

Hotch realized it first." Renee was last seen with a brunette. It's her. DAVE!" He yelled seconds before they heard a gunshot.

Rossi stood in his spot, completely stunned to see the dead girl on the ground. Morgan lowered his gun and walked over to Rossi. The quickness was sometimes...just too quick.

~ 0 ~

When the group returned, Spencer and Penelope were still in the conference room putting away their evidence into boxes. Spencer noticed the way Morgan was walking in with his right arm held a bit too close to himself.

"What happened to you?"

"That guy was huge," Morgan muttered.

"Seriously. You should start working out." Spencer cracked a smile at Morgan's reaction, the latter wasn't very amused.

"Oh, you got jokes now?"

"Mhm!"

"Boys," Penelope scolded the pair, or at least tried to. She failed with her overwhelming concern for everyone who'd gone out.

"What is it, kid?" Rossi had noticed Seaver staring a bit too contemplating at the files on the table that had yet to be put away.

The young agent shrugged her shoulders. "We only rescued 7 victims today." She picked up the decent size of piles. "What about the rest of these?" She didn't understand why this was hitting her more than the other cases she dealt with. Seeing the files, holding them, just irked her. Why was the pile so heavy? Why couldn't it be smaller? Thinner?

"It's a never ending cycle," Aitana said as if she'd been reading Seaver's mind.

"I'm not sure I like it," Seaver said, surprising herself and the others. She carefully set the pile back on the table, her eyes lingering on them with another thought.

"Good work, everybody," Hotch said upon coming in. "Go home and get some rest. Nobody needs to come in till 9:00." He turned to leave but paused to amend his timing, "...:30."

"We were supposed to talk about the meeting!" Penelope exclaimed, stopping Hotch for a second.

He didn't say anything, merely glanced at Aitana. 'It's your call' he was basically saying.

Aitana inwardly sighed. Yes, yes it was and she had already made the decision. She had to go through with it now. "I got it," she assured him. "I'll...handle it." He nodded and continued his way out.

"Handle what?" Penelope asked, her lips close to forming a pout.

Aitana turned back to face them. "Um, I'll be transferring to the Human Resources department." Before Penelope could anything, Aitana quickly added: "I didn't ask to be transferred but it's happening."

"They're doing it again?" frowned Morgan.

"It's different," Aitana promised him. "I know what happened to JJ and she didn't have a choice but I technically did. They want profilers and I've recently reached the conclusion that I like being a liaison. I like being both and the directors don't want that from me."

"But they want you for something," Rossi caught onto her choice of words. She should've known better than to try to be subtle.

She had to nod. "I'm a success story to them right now. I came back from the WPP and I'm still working as an FBI agent. I'm the person they want to use to call new agents into the academy. They also want me to pick the ones I see with potential."

"So it's not because you didn't want to be a profiler—the directors want to use your story," Morgan was disgusted. Plain and entirely disgusted.

"Can't we...can't we fight? Do something?" Penelope's stomach churned as her recent behavior came back to gnaw at her head. Oh, she'd been terrible!

"Yeah, maybe we can reverse their decision," Seaver said. She herself wasn't supposed to be at the BAU after graduation and yet they hadn't touched her.

Aitana shrugged her shoulders. Her teeth chewed deep into her bottom lip. "I would want nothing more than that but I think right now there's nothing I can do. I don't want to be just a profiler and I know it's stupid, possibly childish that I'm leaving rather than taking what they offered—"

"It's not," Spencer said, giving her a sharp look. She had to remember why she'd made the decision in the first place. "You can't be something you don't want to be. I think we can all understand that…?" He looked around the room to make sure they were all agreeing with him.

They were.

"Doesn't mean I won't try to get you back," Penelope warned, "They already took JJ from us, I am not letting them take away my sweet Sprinkles!" She hurried over to encase Aitana in a big hug.

The brunette chuckled. "Does this mean you're not upset with me anymore?"

"Oh honey, I am so sorry!" Penelope broke into a fit of apologies and how she would never let Aitana get distant from them. It was too sweet and very Penelope.

"Hey, is anyone hungry?" Spencer asked the group.

Seaver was quick to answer with a hand on her stomach. "Starving!"

"There's this super good Indian restaurant. It's a little ways away, but it's open 24 hours and they have amazing chicken tandoori."

"Ooh, that sounds good," Aitana said, eyes flickering to Penelope still holding her in a massive hug. "Since we're still attached, you wanna go?"

The blonde nodded. "Yup!"

"Okay, then let's start turning. I gotta go to the office first."

"Okay!" Penelope started turning them for the door and produced an awkward hobble with Aitana that had the others shaking their heads with laughter.

"Looks like you've been replaced in the favorites department," Rossi said to Morgan.

"Yeah. A noble loss," Morgan agreed.

[veryfuckingtrans]

Today i had another very stressful day for no good fucking reason like

-my boss was at the office and i had to sit near him

-i forgot my charger but thankfully it was still on my boss' desk. I took it when he wasnt there but then someone told him "was the charger there yours?" And he directly asked me and i had to explain i had taken it from his desk.

-we had a fire drill and i felt like a stray dog just following people all by myself

-i got up the courage to sit with the other interns who had been nice to me at lunch. I told them i'm working in another project and all that

-i had to do a push to develop (update my code changes to the environment developers use for testing) but accidentally pushed to main (updated my changes to the environment real users use) because i was careless and i almost have a heart attack. There was a "undo" button but i'm still not 100% sure i did it right and i was so close to crying. This is an important system, if it stops working they will call the developers at 2AM on a Saturday to go fix it, and i just changed it accidentally

-the person responsible for my internship talked to my boss (very quietly and facing away from me) and then asked me when i finish my internship. Like girl aren't you supposed to know that? So i had to email my school tutor to ask her, and she might reply tomorrow or she might reply in two weeks, there's no way to know.

-the bus back home was so full we couldnt even move and people were very rude about it

-a friend wanted to go to the taylor swift concert and they asked me to sign up for the presale months ago. Today i got an email saying there were some tickets for sale last minute and i sent it to them. I hadnt talked to them in months and then they sent me a voice message, i'm still too scared to listen.

-i'm trying to do the design/user interface for the app we have to do as a final project (me and 2 friends. One of them changed something that broke the entire page and the other has not done one single thing) and nothing works and i am extremely bad at focusing on tasks so instead of having a simple working header i started to look up stock photos for the background and tried to see if i could use AI to create a logo for the page and i just spent so much time and nothing works and everything looks ugly

-i have not told my mum i'm hanging out with a friend this weekend, on friday we're going to a talk and on saturday to a party. This friend had drama with my sibling and my mum doesn't like her and gets upset every time i mention her

-my parents are looking into building a house and want me to go with them so tomorrow after work i have to go fucking talk with some architect i guess

Everything is so small and so insignificant but my chest hurts and i'm starting to get an eye tick and i feel like i'm gonna be sick on my way to work. I can't help but think anxiety meds would help right about now, but i sort of enjoy the way i can feel all my emotions intensely now. So idk. Shit's hard.

[keephisname]

8/6/2023 @ 1:37 a.m.

It's been a few days. I honestly haven't been doing much better.

Clove has been, thankfully, keeping me in line. I've realized over the last few days that I'm kind of a bad person. I'm not really sure where it came from. But oh dear god, how bad I've wanted to be petty. I've wanted to message your younger sister type petty. I wanna text you again and tell you you're a bad friend for doing this type petty. I wanna go to your house type petty. I wanna leave a note on your car type petty, I wanna tell friends just outside your circle type petty. But I also learned I'm a coward. Cause everything I want to do is not directly at you.

I honestly didn't think you were working today when I went in to return those shoes. I thought you had taken weekends off this summer. Maybe you picked up a shift. Maybe it was just another thing you didn't tell me. But I couldn't face you when I saw you at the register. Clove said it would be fine, that you weren't even at the register, you were just at the desk, and it would be okay. But I couldn't do it. The sides of my vision got dark, and my chest got heavy. Again, just by seeing you. Clove was worried I would confront you in some way, when the reality was seeing you at that moment sent me into a near panic attack.

I pushed the shoes at him and got out of the building. The last thing I was going to do would be to make this public to strangers.

I did post about you in an off-handed way on Snap. Again, both petty and a coward. But, in my twisted defense, I had gotten no more than three hours of sleep in 3 days. I was up every single night thinking about losing you, how you were feeling, and just how awful you made me feel. I just wanted you to know how shitty I felt cause you cut me off in this way. It frustrates me not knowing how you're feeling, cause I'm awful and want you to hurt just as bad as I do. I just mentioned everything that happened in the month and concluded it with the last thing that happened in July -- you. I dint mention your name. just that I "damaged the relationship with my best friend of ten years." I followed it up with a post about the support structures that I have and did send genuine appreciation to those who have helped me. I didn't mean the second one to be pointed out against you. I honestly didn't think you'd see either of them. I was surprised you did check.

I did get messages from people I haven't talked to in a long, long time. Some I barely even know anymore. That felt nice, in a weird way.

Also, I told Buzz what happened. I miss her so much, she's always been an angel. I told her you cut us off (Myself, Clove, and Richie), and that it wasn't good. I told her to reach out to you and check on you. I hope you talk to her, and open up to her a little. Talking to her always makes me feel better, and I hope she makes you feel better too.

Richie did text me. I'm going to tell him to get in contact with you. I understand cutting off me and Clove, but Richie didn't do any of what you told us. It feels like he just ended up swept into this without any say or wrongdoing on his part.

I just can't bring myself to tell my family. They'll ask too many questions and it will just make me feel awful all over again. I'm just not ready for that yet. I know I have to, but goddamn it's so hard.

I'm debating texting you when I head up to school. I don't know if it'll be too soon, but I feel bad thinking that ill leave and not say goodbye. I don't know. I don't want to push you so hard that you end up blocking me.

Today was better. I have no idea how the rest of this week is going to go. Maybe ill get better at writing these.

xx,

Ms. U

P.S. I figured I'd get in the habit of using fake names. I know that's cliche, but I think one of the reasons writing these entries is making me feel better is because it feels like this is fiction or some weird reality story that'll "one day go viral and it'll become a movie" type beat. It's nice, nad it makes it a little fun in a weird way.

[crohnsdiseased]

just felt like rambling about my school’s bullshit somewhere that isn’t *as* directly tied to me lmao

christ. i tested positive for covid (no fucking idea where i got it) and so they have to put me in the quarantine dorms, which already sucks because i have to move across campus during finals and be alone and whatever but i get it, they have to deliver us all food, it makes sense. i hate it but it makes sense!

the quarantine dorms are on the 4th floor of the freshmen dorms. which infamously have no elevator.

i email the guy handling it all to be like hey are there any lower floor options, i’m disabled and i don’t think i’ll be able to carry my belongings up Three Flights Of Stairs. he says no, but you have plenty of time to move in so it’ll be fine. (i had 3 hours to move in from the time the email was sent)

im like. ok. i’ll try. i guess. i gather my belongings and push a cart full of everything i need for 10 days— including shit like toilet paper, bedding, etc because they do not provide that in the quarantine dorms— Across Campus. i am disabled, i have covid, it’s fucking cold out, i am already tired from that. i get to the freshmen dorms. i get to the first set of stairs. i Cannot get my belongings up even One Step.

i immediately email again saying hey this isn’t gonna work i literally am unable to get up the stairs, i am disabled, can someone be sent to help me. while waiting for a reply, in the cold, i try lugging my stuff up the stairs again. can’t even get a step up. again.

after an hour. an Hour. i send a followup message. saying hey. im sorry for sending so many messages. but i am in the freezing cold, because i do not want to wait inside, because i do not want to spread covid. i CANNOT get up the stairs. Please Do Something For Me. i still do not get a reply. half an hour passes. my mom is threatening to call every official on the planet. me, being socially anxious, is like pppplease no id rather freeze.

after a while i am So cold and tired, and mind you i woke up at 7am after sleeping like shit bc covid has given me insomnia (usually im great at sleeping), so i go up to one building that has the office of res life. idfk what every office does so im like ok maybe they can help me. and i ask the front desk person if they can ask if someone can help me. they ask who ive been emailing with, i tell them, they’re like oh he’s back here, they go back and talk to him. they come back and say “im sorry we can’t help you.” this person seems genuinely sorry and like they want to help but that a higher up, mr. Ignoring My Fucking Emails, is saying they can’t. by this point i am mere seconds away from sobbing so im like :) thank you… and leave and then have a lil breakdown in the bathroom where i can’t even wipe my snot face bc i have fucking covid and i feel bad enough even using a public bathroom at all

anyway i gave my mom permission to call whoever she wanted and she called around. i was told multiple times someone would be ‘contacting me’ and nobody did. it’s another 45 minutes. she calls the health center and there’s a nurse there who is SO horrified that NO ONE IS DOING ANYTHING that she walks halfway across campus in full Plague Gear to me. and she carries my belongings. up three flights of stairs. the entire time being like “it is Ridiculous that they make students with covid do this wtf” and i thank her a hundred times and my mom sends an email being like “pls give nurse a raise. pls tell email jerk he sucks.” the nurse is my guardian angel.

30 minutes after arriving in the dorm, email jerk replies to me saying i should abandon my belongings at the bottom of the stairs (in the middle of the dorm yard) and go to the dorm and he ‘may’ have someone come by in 15 minutes to bring my things up for me. i say … no. no thanks im at the dorm.

anyway shoutout to my school i guess

[from-a-reckless-writer]

iv. couch.

read on ao3

To Lena: r u busy??? U didnt answer my calls. Dinner later?

To Lena: my place.

To Lena: Or yours! Can totally go to urs. If u want.

To Lena: Lena????

To Lena: where are u??

To Lena: Answer my calls

To Lena: Pls?

Kara rounds the corner of her hallway, keys bitten, dangling from her lips, as she types with both hands. Her 67th text message of the day to an MIA Lena Luthor sent. She fails to notice the creature lurking around the front of her door; dark fur shining under the cheap LED lights of Kara’s corridor.

She’s still deeply absorbed in her phone with worry, in the middle of jamming her keys in with one hand, when something furry brushes against her legs and Kara yelps.

She pulls the knob clean out of the wood in shock, her phone dropping to the floor loudly, the cat doing a duet with her with a startled yowl of her own.

Heart hammering and adrenaline racing, Kara looks down and sees the cat for the first time.

“Oh! Oh!” she gasps, “I didn’t see you there, buddy. I’m sorry for startling you!! I didn’t mean it.”

The door knob clatters loudly to the ground as it falls out of her grasp. And Kara sheepishly feels guilty for the hole in her door. But the cat meows loudly, catching her attention, as if in response to her apology.

She crouches down low, and reaches out a hand to touch the furball. She snaps a quick pic, sends it to Lena and pockets her phone.

To Lena: KITTY!!

“Oh, oh come here,” she coos, “where’s your collar? How’d you get here huh?”

The cat reminds her of Streaky. The first stray who ever took to her kindly. Although upon closer inspection, Kara realizes this one has striking emeralds for eyes, Streaky’s eyes were a more softer blue.

The cat surprisingly seems friendly, immediately leaning into Kara’s touch. Nosing at the inside of Kara’s wrist and it’s such a familiar gesture but she can’t seem to remember why.

And...oh, a small rumbling echoes through Kara’s palm!

Oh, they’re purring!

Kara doesn’t know how long she stays there crouched low exactly, but eventually, she stands up, takes her hand away, and picks up the damaged doorknob.

“Well, time for you to go home now, buddy,” she tells them, giving their head one last pat before dusting off her hands on her jacket.

“Go on, shooo. Shoo. Go home. I’m sure your human is looking for you.”

But the cat remains unmoving. It looks like they’ve decided to sit firmly in front of Kara’s doorstep, casually licking a paw, as if waiting for Kara to open her door.

“Are you actually waiting for me to open my door?” Kara makes a mental note to thank Rao that none of her neighbors can see her trying to hold a proper conversation with a cat.

“Look, kitty,” she says firmly, “I’m not your human.”

The cat just blinks owlishly at her. Eyes too green, too intelligent and-

Kara makes up her mind.

She turns her face skywards, takes a deep breath (This will probably backfire, she already knows. But she's always had a soft spot for strays.) and then she pushes her door wide open.

The cat races inside, cutting through Kara’s legs and almost tripping her.

“Well, somebody’s excited,” Kara mutters under her breath, she watches the cat head for her living room couch; watches as they pause all of a sudden, changes course and jumps onto Kara’s coffee table instead.

Where the cat then proceeds to knock down everything in close vicinity, even the picture frame of her and Lena together.

“Hey! No! Bad kitty-”

But the cat is already hopping down from her pedestal, landing on the frame directly.

And then things get weird.

The cat proceeds to stomp all over it, meows loud, like really loud; insanely loud for a cat their size.

Her paw seems to be almost pointing? At the other person in the frame.

“I-” Kara seems taken aback by the bizarre behavior, sure she knows cats are vastly different from dogs, but this…

This is just weird.

The cat’s meowing only seems to get louder.

How you land yourselves in these situations, Kara. I really just don’t know, at this point. She can almost hear Alex say.

“What are you- Are you- are you pointing? That’s- That’s Lena, yeah. That’s my best friend.”

At that, the cat seems to vibrate. They start clawing at Kara’s pant leg, meowing and meowing and meowing—

And then it hits her.

"-but it turns out that she’s a witch. And apparently, so am I."

The green, green eyes.

A pink nose nuzzling against her wrist.

“Lena?”

******

“Oh, Rao! Lena you’re a cat! What happened?! Oh, no, baby what did you do?”

Lena-

Lena The Cat—and okay, so she’s still wrapping her head around that one—just stays silent. She’s sitting on her lap, looking regal than any cat has any right to be. A judgmental look in her eyes.

Lena’s a cat. Cat’s can’t speak. Can’t answer Kara’s questions.

“Right. Sorry. Only meow,” Kara murmurs, embarrassed. For some reason even in cat form Lena manages to be intimidating.

“Okay so, uh d-does that mean you still understand me? Two meows for yes. One meow for no.”

Kara gets two meows.

“Okay, cool, cool. Great. You can still understand me, that's good.” Kara runs a hand down her spine, “Gosh, your fur is just so soft.”

She hears Lena give a small growl, body tensing, “Right. Right. Sorry. Not the time for pets.” Kara retracts her hand away.

“Uhm, so next question then, I guess? D-did you become a cat this morning? Were you testing out your uhm...gift?”

Lena meows twice. Kara nods, clenching and unclenching her fist underneath her chin. Fingers itching to run themselves through Lena’s soft fur again. Lena seems to sense this, and nuzzles her face into Kara’s hand, bumps against her repeatedly.

“Really?” Kara double-checks, giddy. If she were human Kara bets Lena would be rolling her eyes like she always does when Kara does something particularly dorky, but she just pushes her head firmer against Kara’s hand and meows twice.

“So uhm,” she starts, cautiously, noting Lena’s increasing purr, “is there like a spellbook for this or something? Something that can help you transform back?

Lena meows yes.

“Is it in The Tower or back at your place?”

There are no responses.

“Sorry, sorry lemme rephrase, is it in The Tower?”

She gets two consecutive meows.

Okay, to The Tower it is.

******

“Are you going to tell me why you’re cradling a cat in your cape or??” Alex raises a brow at her, a hand on her hip, left foot tapping impatiently. Her sister was heading out for the day, it looks like. It was just tough luck that Supergirl landed one minute before the elevator took Alex.

Crap. Now they have to explain. They didn’t talk about this. Lena still hasn’t told her if it was okay to tell people about her gift.

“I-I rescued it,” Kara says.

Well, that isn’t so far from the truth, right? She stares at the bundle in her arms, Lena the traitor staying silent all the while—green eyes shining all innocent at Kara.

Alex’s stares intensifies.

“From a tree,” Kara flounders, and Lena The Cat has the audacity to yawn, squirm and jump away from her arms. She lands gracefully, tail swishing up in the air and heads straight for the lab.

Alex eyes the cat suspiciously before turning back to Kara. She jabs a finger to her chest. “It better not have any fleas. It better not touch my training mat.”

“She won’t.”

Alex just shakes her head, rolls her eyes, grabs her helmet and walks to the elevator.

Before she goes though, Alex says, “You know, this is gonna sound weird, but I swear I think I saw that same cat slinking out of The Tower earlier this morning.”

“Alex, she’s literally a black cat. There are hundreds of black cats in the city.”

“You're being weirdly defensive about this. Why are you being weird?”

“I’m not.”

Alex seems like she wants to say more, but the elevator dings, and she’s never been more grateful that Kelly makes Alex pick her up from work. Alex huffs out breath, before conceding and disappearing into the lift.

******

The camera flash is what gets Kara busted.

But is it really her fault if she walked in on a cute kitty, hunched over, meowing adorably, trying to flip over the pages of a thick spellbook, with her teeny-tiny bean paws?

Lena hisses at her, teeth-bared and fur puffy.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. But you were just really, really, really cute okay?” She walks closer to the desk, carefully lifts a hand and scratches Lena behind the ear.

The hissing slowly devolves into purring, and Kara grins triumphantly. Lena lets herself be picked up after a few moments, Kara leafing through the pages for her.

“So, found anything yet?” She asks, cradling Lena close to her chest. A warm weight on Kara’s arms, and as much as she wants to get her real Lena back, she also isn’t too eager on giving up this version anytime soon. Then again, Kara thinks, it would be impossible for her to give up any version of Lena Luthor.

“Spell? Charm? Anything? Do you need to make a potion? Are we gonna get to make a potion? Oh, oh do you need a wand? Do you have a wa-”

Kara’s words get muffled as two black paws press against her lips. Lena’s green eyes narrowing at her. She meows at Kara. Loudly.

“Mkay, mkay. Shut up. Got it.”

Lena removes her paws, and Kara makes a gesture of zipping her lips together. This seems to appease Lena enough because the next second, a pink tongue darts out and she...licks Kara's nose.

“Did you- did you just lick me?” Kara gasps out.

Lena doesn’t even acknowledge her with a meow, just turns away and jumps out of her arms again. Before Kara can do anything about it though, her phone rings.

The screen lighting up with Andrea’s name.

“Danvers, I’ve got a story for you.”

******

“Alex, please, I’ll be quick. I promise. I’ll only be three hours at the most. Please just look after her,” she pleads, pouting and puppy eyes in full power.

It also helps that the cat burrito in her cape looks to be cooperating. Lena The Cat staring at Alex with wide round eyes.

Apparently, some governor was found dead downtown, and now Andrea wants her on the scene. She can’t just leave Lena all alone in The Tower. No matter how hard Lena’s been protesting, this is brand new territory for both of them. Nobody knows the extent of Lena’s powers.

Point is, Kara would feel a lot better if she were to leave Lena under the care of someone she trusts. Even if said someone, accuses Lena of being a stray with fleas. It's still better than leaving Lena all on her own.

“Ugh.” Alex groans and Kara knows she’s won. “If this cat causes trouble I will throw it out the window, Kara.”

“No!” Kara yells, distressed. “Don’t do that. She’ll behave. She promises.”

She puts her hand under Lena’s arms and raises her up to eye level—Simba style. “You promise to be good for Alex, don’t you?”

All she gets is a lot of squirming and screaming, there were also a lot of attempts at scratching Kara’s nose.

“See?” Kara says, chuckling nervously. “She’s telling you she’s good.”

Alex looks skeptical, her arms crossed against her chest.

Kara sets her down on the couch, and crouches down low.

She tries to pet her head, but Lena bites at her finger, she catches her teeth on the skin of her supersuit’s thumb slot. She bites deeper, her teeth accomplishing nothing but a few dents.

And oh, Rao she thinks she’s such a feral little cat but her pink adorable gummy snarl says otherwise.

“I’m sorry, I’ll be back. I promise,” she whispers, careful not to let Alex hear. “And then we’ll figure it out later, okay? The safest place for you right now is to be with Alex.”

She really doesn’t want to go, and based on Lena’s protests she doesn’t want Kara to go either. But well, Andrea had finally threatened to fire her if she disobeyed...which is...fair.

She’s aware she’s been doing a less than stellar job at being a journalist lately. Rao, what an understatement. This is basically her make it or break it.

“Look, I’ll be quick, promise. Be good to Alex,” Kara murmurs. She presses a kiss on Lena’s furry forehead. Lena finally unclenches her jaw and lets Kara go. The little whine she lets out, letting Kara know that she knows the battle’s lost.

“Both of you, be good,” Kara tells them sternly. “Alex, please don’t yeet my cat out of the window.”

Alex shrugs, staring at the cat with suspicion. “I make no promises.’

Lena is staring at Alex just as hostile. Great. They both deserve each other.

Kara sighs exasperatedly. Well, at least she tried.

******

She gets a very angry Alex Danvers on the line, right after she’s finished talking to some sources. It’s nighttime now, and when she checks her watch—yep, she’s left Lena in Alex’s care for more than six hours.

Crap.

“Hey, Al—”

“KARA IF YOU DON’T PICK UP THIS THIS THIS GODDAMNED HAIRBALL RIGHT NOW, YOU WILL NEVER SEE IT EVER AGAIN.”

There is loud meowing, and then, “What the- Get off! Get off me right no-”

The line clicks dead.

Kara Danvers quickly changes into an alley, manages to break the sound barrier.

******

It’s Kelly who opens the door.

“Hey, Kara,” she greets her. Kara is impatiently rocking on her heels, trying to peer past Kelly’s shoulders.

The place was quiet; ridiculously quiet, and Kara feels fear swoop in her belly.

“Please, tell me my cat is still alive,” Kara bursts out, Kelly just gives her a pained smile and oh, no, oh no.

She muscles her way past Kelly to a brooding Alex on the couch.

Lena is nowhere to be seen.

“Alex, Alex where’s my cat? Where is she? Where did you put her?”

Alex finally looks up at her, Kara taking notice of the red marks on her arm.

Oh no, Lena, what did you do?

“Calm down, I didn’t throw the little demon away. She’s-" Alex sing-songs before finishing, "on time-out.”

“Time-out?” Kara asks, voice shaking. Rao, does she really want to know.

Alex takes too long to answer, taking a swig of her beer first before pointing to a corner in the living room.

And there, she spots it.

It, being a small pile of laundry on the floor, next to an upside down hamper. A big white hamper housing one Lena Luthor. There's a crude cardboard sign stuck on it; "Kitty Jail". Alex has also stacked a few encyclopedia on top of it, no doubt an attempt to keep Lena from escaping.

“Oh! Oh, Lena!”

Kara superspeeds her way and scoops Lena up, the cat meowing immediately and curling into Kara’s chest.

“You named the cat after Lena?!”

Crap.

Kara turns around slowly, “Uhm yeah?”

Alex just shakes her head. “Unbelievable.”

“Her eyes reminded me of Lena, okay?!” Kara yells defensively, pressing tiny kisses onto Lena’s fur.

“I’m sorry that Alex has been such a meanie to you," she coos, "I know you didn’t deserve it, baby."

Alex seems to perk up at that, because she raises up from the couch. “That,” Alex jabs a finger in their direction, Kara cradles Lena protectively, “That baby ruined my couch and she so totally deserves all the mean! All the mean in the world, Kara!”

Lena hisses in her arms.

“No, no. That’s not true. Lena is baby and she’s perfect and you’re just a meanie.”

“She ruined my upholstery! She left hair all over the place and that’s not even to mention the scratching!”

“Because you were mean to her!”

Alex scoffs, eyes bulging wide in disbelief.

“Get out,” Alex says, her brows pinching comically, “Get out of my apartment before that little devil causes more damage.”

“Gladly,” Kara says, and Lena meows her assent. They make their way past Alex, Kara unaware that Lena has stuck out her little tongue at Alex over her shoulder.

“And she’s not a little devil!” Kara calls out.

Alex slams the door in her face.

******

That evening, Kara pores over a thick spellbook, eyes swimming with Latin symbols with a purring machine on her lap.

By midnight, Kara has managed to pass out on her couch, a black cat curled on her chest.

The spellbook lay open on her coffee table, forgotten.

******

The first sight that greets Kara when she wakes up are green eyes.

Green human eyes.

And then it hits her.

“Lena!”

The spell had blessedly wore off by morning, and Kara’s never been more glad to see the sunlight lighting up Lena’s face.

For a moment, Kara’s assaulted with the mental image of laying in a pool of sunlight with a black cat stretching leisurely next to her.

“Good morning,” Lena purrs, and oh Rao, that sound is much, much better than her meowing.

“You’re back!” Kara gasps in awe.

“I’m back,” she whispers, she’s still draped fully over Kara on the couch. A blanket covering them both.

“Rao, I missed you.” A palm comes up to cup her cheeks, Lena automatically nuzzling into the inside of her wrist.

“Mm, I missed me, too,” Lena tells her, face breaking into a small smile. Kara traces her fingers up and down Lena’s spine. Oh, how she’s missed touching Lena’s skin.

Wait-

Skin.

Is she-

“Lena,” Kara begins, swallowing. Her nerves not going unnoticed.

Lena raises a brow at her. “Kara?”

“Are you- uhm- ah. Are you naked right now?”

Lena’s eyes light up like a cat’s and Kara knows she’s in trouble.

“Mm. It seems that I am,” Lena says, and all Kara can do is gulp.

“What are you gonna do about it?”

special shoutout to @mike-wachowski, @sexybread-png and @thebreakfastgod for their cat expertise without whom this silly little fic would not be written.

[missvelvetsstuff]

Low Expectations

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Reader has low self esteem when she meets Bucky. Can he convince her that she's the one he wants.

Chapter 7

Warnings: swearing, fluff. This chapter is mostly filler

Bucky crashed pretty quickly that night but was up before the sun and couldn't go back to sleep. He tried to keep himself occupied until he knew Y/N would probably be awake and sent her a text...

'Hey doll. I'm sorry I was gone so long but want to see you as soon as you have the time. I miss you.'

He set his phone down and tried to find something to keep himself occupied.

Y/N woke up after another rough night. She hadn't been able to sleep wondering how Bucky was and when she would hear from him so gave up and ate an edible which did the trick. She slept almost too deeply and didn't really remember any dreams. She climbed out of bed, groggy, and directly into the bathroom. After she finished her shower and wrapped up in her big plush towel she went to look through her closet for something to wear to work. Once she fixed her hair and got dressed she sat down to have coffee and relax for a few minutes before she had to leave. Her phone buzzed just as she was sitting down and the butterflies started. She took a breath and looked at her texts, her heart sped up.

It was Bucky. She opened the message and smiled then typed out a quick reply...

'I'm glad you're home safe. I'm working all week but free in the evenings as long as I'm not up too late. I missed you too.'

Bucky jumped when his phone buzzed, it had only been a few minutes and he smiled when he saw it was from Y/N. He replied right away.

'Can I bring dinner over tonight?'

'Sure around 6:30'

Bucky grinned

'See you tonight doll.'

And started to put his phone down when it buzzed again. A text from Sam with a link to tmz...

'Have you seen this?'

He opened the link and frowned. Pictures that were definitely him, since there were glimpses of his arm, and Y/N even though her face wasn't pictured as clearly as his. One in her corset, looking out his bedroom window. He shook his head in disgust, her face wasn't clear but that seemed like a violation of their privacy. He read the article about the Winter Soldiers mystery lady, scoffing at the speculation until he saw a picture from the presser with Sam in DC. That senators aide had been really aggressive with him, offering anything she could do to help him. The article mentioned the discrepancies in the aides height vs Y/N, accusing him of being a player. He shook his head, thank goodness Y/N would know better if she saw the picture. Wouldn't she? After everything that had happened and her past, he worried that she might think there was something with him and that aide. He started to panic about it but was able to talk himself down. Everything was fine. He would be seeing her tonight and it would all be fine. He was sure of it. Mostly.

Y/N spent the day at work arguing with her supervisor because she was written up for a phone call that took a good portion of the day last Friday to resolve. The write up stated she spent too much time with one caller. "Look Dennis, you want me to make sure the callers issue is resolved right? Well sometimes that takes time and multiple phone calls. I don't appreciate being dinged for doing a thorough job."

"You're a great rep, Y/N one of my best and you know I don't agree with this but it's one of the downsides of working in a call center. You need to find a way to get around this stuff. I'm sorry, the write up stands."

Y/N shook her head "I'm not signing it."

and walked back to her desk grumbling about corporate bullshit.

Sheila patted her on the back when she passed her "Be a mindless cog or suffer the consequences. Gotta love call centers."

Y/N laughed "No, I really don't. Is it 5:00 yet?"

Sheila smirked "Why? You got a hot date?" What happened with the guy, the one you are so mysterious about? You know from the tmz pics."

Y/N shook her head "TMZ? I never said anything about tmz pics. How would I possibly end up there? I'm no one."

"Oh come on. I helped you pick out that corset a couple of weeks ago, I know it's you. You're killing me here. I might be sitting next to a real life celebrity adjacent person and you won't even give me a bone. I thought we were friends."

Y/N shook her head "If you saw the pics then you must have read the article and who it was talking about so you don't need anything from me. However, I might be seeing someone infamous after work tonight and he might be a tall, gorgeous soldier with a questionable past. And that's all I know. I have to get back on the phone before Dennis fires me."

Sheila laughed "Dennis loves you, he'd never fire you." And answered a call.

Y/N smiled at her friend as she took a call too.

The rest of the afternoon dragged by and Y/N swore the clock was going backwards. It sure felt like time was going in reverse. Finally she looked up and it was 4:55 so she cleared off her desk and gathered her things up. When the clock hit 5 she logged off her computer, grabbed her stuff and left, waving goodbye to Sheila.

When Y/N made it home she straightened up and took a quick shower then put on a maxi dress that was pretty and very comfortable. She saw that it was a few minutes after 6 and made herself a wine cooler. She turned some music on and sat down to wait.

Bucky spent the day trying to figure out what to say to Y/N. He was afraid to ask her to be his girl again and absolutely didn't plan on having sex with her tonite. He wanted to be able to take his time and didn't want to worry about alarms or jobs the next morning. After chatting with Sam he decided to invite Y/N to get out of town for a couple of days, that way there shouldn't be any interruptions. Someplace where they could sleep separately if that's what she wanted.

Bucky stopped on his way there to get flowers, with a vase, and dinner. When he arrived at her building he walked around the block to try and calm himself. At 6:25 he went upstairs and knocked on her door.

Y/N had started daydreaming and jumped a little at the knocking at her door. She stood up and wiped the wrinkles from her dress and opened the door.

Bucky stood there with flowers, Chinese food and a big grin on his face.

"Hey doll"

"Hi Bucky" Y/N looked at him with a shy grin and welcomed him inside. He handed her the flowers and she laughed when she realized they came with a vase.

After he set the food on the table he pulled her into him for a hug, just enjoying the feel and scent of having her close to him. "I really did miss you" he murmured into her hair.

They heard a sound from the hall and pulled apart when Terri came out of her room in pajamas with a green face mask. "Don't mind me, I'm taking mine to go" she grabbed a plate of food and went back to her room.

Bucky laughed "She really is something else." And they sat at the table where Y/N had put out plates and napkins.

She nodded "You ain't seen nothin but yeah she's a good friend."

They sat to eat and it was quiet except for some blues on the stereo. They were both nervous, still plagued by thoughts of past rejections and heartbreak.

Once she had eaten enough to take the edge off of her hunger and finished her wine cooler, Y/N spoke up "How did your emergency with Sam go? Or is it one of those 'I could tell you but I'd have to kill you' situations?"

Bucky laughed "Don't worry doll I could never hurt you. Just some alien tech in the hands of some militia group. Seems like we'll never stop finding more."

She nodded "Now that people know that kind of stuff is out there you will always find more.

I didn't see all of the details but from what I did see you got some appreciation from the government among others. One woman seemed particularly interested in showing her appreciation." She teased

Bucky flinched "Yeah, I didn't even think about it until Sam sent me a link from tmz. She was one of the senators aides and didn't seem to understand the word no."

She smiled sadly at him "She's very pretty"

Bucky shrugged "If you say so. I only have eyes for one woman right now."

She felt her face heat up. "Anyone I know? Maybe I should let you go see her instead of wasting your time here."

He shook his head "Time with you isn't wasted. Honestly, I can't think of anything I'd rather do with my time. In fact I was wondering how you would feel about going away with me for a couple of days. I have a veterans charity thing Thursday nite so wanted to know if you would like to go with me, we could head out right after. Tony Stark had a house in the Hamptons and Pepper told me I could use it for a few days. It has a number of bedrooms so we don't have to share a bed unless you want to and it's right on the beach with space between neighbors so we'd have plenty of privacy." He looked at her hopefully.

She smiled at him. "I think I can take a couple of days off. Do I need a fancy dress or anything?"

Bucky got distracted thinking of her in a formal gown, something soft and silky without too many ruffles or frills.

"Bucky? You ok in there?" She asked softly

Bucky blushed and shook his head "What? Oh sorry, distracted myself for a minute. It's semi formal so kinda fancy. I'm wearing a suit. Sam will be there and Torres."

She looked confused "Torres?"

"Oh right you didn't actually meet him. Torres is the one who was pounding on my door last time I saw you. He's a good kid if annoying"

Y/N laughed "I'm pretty sure you find almost everyone annoying"

Bucky looked at her in feigned offense "That's not true! You aren't annoying at all. You make me crazy but in a good way." He paused to take her hand in his and kiss it. "If you need a dress I can give you Peppers number, I'm sure she knows all the best shops."

Y/N gulped "You mean Pepper Potts-Stark? I'm sure she has designers begging her to wear their clothes. I could never afford anything like what she wears but I'm sure I can find something acceptable by Thursday."

Bucky grinned hopefully "I can buy you a dress if you like. Wait. Does that mean yes? You'll go with me?"

She smirked "How could I ever say no to someone as adorable as you."

Bucky grumbled "I'm definitely not adorable but I'll let that slide since you said yes."

They sat and talked until almost midnight when she yawned "I'm sorry Buck but I need to get some sleep if I'm going to make it through work tomorrow. Don't want to be slacking before I ask for 2 days off."

Bucky helped her clean up the mess from dinner and kissed her goodnight. He had to force himself to leave after the goodnight kiss turned into another make out session and he started slowly rutting into her. He groaned as he pulled away. "You really are something, doll. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tuesday after work Y/N and Terri went shopping for a dress. After trying on what felt like a hundred dresses they found one that Y/N liked and could afford. A purple off the shoulder vintage style tea length dress with lace accents. And shoes to match. Then a necklace and earrings with amethysts. She decided to wear the corset and stockings from their last big date. She had also scheduled a hair and nail appointment for Thursday afternoon.

When they got home she called Bucky "I found a dress. I hope you like it"

"You could wear a potato sack and I will still think you are gorgeous. It's late are you just getting home? Have you had anything to eat?"

Y/N laughed "Yes dad, we ate while we were out."

"Hey" he objected "I just want to make sure you're taking care of yourself. Can't have you getting sick before I get to show you off."

"Don't worry, I won't get sick"

Bucky sighed "Good because I hate these things but knowing you'll be on my arm makes it worthwhile"

"Doesn't helping veterans make a difference?"

"Yeah I just wish I could do it without having to go out and be nice to a bunch of rich jerks and politicians. Steve started it and now Sam is the honorary head of the charity but he insists that I go. It's usually one of the only nights I go out but after I meet whoever Sam decides I need to meet I always hang out with the old soldiers. This time they'll all be jealous because I'll have the prettiest girl by my side.

It's late doll, go get some rest and I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Ok, G'nite James."

@lokisasgardianvampirequeen

"Nite Y/N"

Chapter 8

@jennyamanda8

@geeky-politics-46

@vicmc624

@jesuisbenny

@matchat3a

@silverfire475

@army24--7